Inspector Gadget: The Pilot
by Galaxy1001D
Summary: An adventure before the cartoon series that started it all. Inspector Gadget and his niece Penny are drawn together when a MAD bomber destroys Dollar Labs.
1. Dollar, Dollar, and Dollar

**Inspector Gadget: The Pilot**

_Inspector Gadget and all related characters and setting are owned by __**Cookie Jar Entertainment**__. DiC now remains an in-credit name only. Star Trek is owned by Paramount, Viacom, and CBS. Snoopy and Peanuts are owned by Peanuts Worldwide. Aliens is own by 20__th__ century Fox._

_Chapter One: Dollar, Dollar, and Dollar_

Inspector Gadget was five foot eight with an average build. His long face had beady black eyes and his messy black hair had a receding hairline. He wasn't going to win any beauty contests. No one in his family ever did. Therefore, it was always a mystery how his sister managed to marry a blonde Adonis of a man with green eyes. His sister's husband had managed to win three beauty contests when he was in college. That was strange enough, but one of them was for girls! So how had his sister managed to land that guy?

Perhaps it was the fact that they were both super geniuses, he reflected as he visited them as their research lab building. They were working on separate projects in adjoining laboratories. It must be lonely not having anybody who has the slightest idea what you're talking about, Gadget decided. When Gadget visited them he simply smiled, nodded and pretended to understand what they were talking about. Come to think of it, he did that a lot, even when _not _in the company of super geniuses.

"Hi there, Sylvia," he greeted as he came in the door to the lab. "How's my favorite sister?"

"I'm your only sister Max," she retorted wryly.

"That's why you're my favorite," he shrugged. "How's Penny? Still wowing 'em at school? It can be hard for girl that smart to fit in. I remember how hard it was for you…"

"That's not why I asked you over here," Sylvia interrupted. "I wanted to show you my latest project. The computer book."

"It just looks like a standard laptop to me," he shrugged. "Oh wait! I get it! It looks like an ordinary book on the outside. So this is a book that lets you read things online?"

"No Max," his sister giggled. "This is more sophisticated than any computer, portable or otherwise! It can analyze almost any electronic machine and override its control functions. It can analyze and process data from nearly any source! It's like having a portable crime scene investigation unit combined with a _Star Trek_ tricorder combined with the ultimate remote control!"

"I'm sorry Sis, but you lost me," Gadget smiled ruefully.

"At what part?"

"The part after you said 'No Max,'" the inspector shrugged.

"Max," she giggled, "you never change. Now look. I want to show you my other project. This watch is really something. It looks like an old style digital watch, but it has a two-way communicator with a computer, radio, cutting laser, and an electromagnet!"

"Does it come in men's sizes?" Gadget asked as he picked it up and attempted to place it on his wrist. He pushed a button and his gun slipped out of his gray raincoat to attach itself to the watch. "Wowsers! It's a good thing I didn't activate the laser!" He set it down and a yellow beam of light came out of the device to start burning a hole in the wall. "Sorry about that that Sylvia," he blushed.

Sylvia shut it off leaving a smoking hole in the wall. "Silly me, this is the one I made in Penny's size," she said as she attempted to ignore her brother's clumsiness.

"Penny's size?" Gadget repeated in disbelief. "You made one for your eight-year-old daughter?"

"Well, Nick and both have one," his sister blushed, "but I really designed it for _you_. As one of Interpol's top agents, you could use a spy gizmo like this."

"Now wait a minute," Gadget corrected her. "Interpol differs from most law-enforcement agencies—we don't make arrests ourselves, and there is no single Interpol jail where criminals are taken. The agency functions as an administrative liaison between the law-enforcement agencies of the member countries, providing communications and an international database collection."

"You're also an inspector with the Metro City Police Department and part of an Interpol incident response team," his sister insisted. "Come on. I know that Interpol keeps a handful of secret agents to combat international crimes and terrorist plots. Nobody is supposed to know it exists, but you told Penny everything, and she spilled the beans."

"I assumed you wouldn't believe a little girl," Gadget blushed. "When I informed her that I was both a police inspector _and_ a secret agent, I never thought anyone would believe me."

"No police inspector gets as many company paid vacations overseas like you do," his sister said.

"I guess I should know better than to try to pull one over on you," Gadget shrugged.

"That, and Chief Quimby asked me to design your new Gadgetmobile," his sister teased. "It was supposed to be a surprise. They'll let you have it after your people finish testing it."

"A new car! Wowzers!" Gadget gushed. He had wrecked three cars this year in the line of duty and was now driving the Volkswagen bug the department called 'the Loaner'.

At that moment an interior door that led into the laboratory of Nick L. Dollar opened. "Gadget!" Sylvia's husband greeted. Sylvia was the only one who called him 'Max.' Even their daughter Penny called him 'Uncle Gadget'. "Come over here!" he said as he opened the door into his adjoining lab. "You won't believe what I've come up with!"

"Still working with canines, Dollar?" Gadget asked as he walked over and shook his hand.

"Absolutely!" the blonde man grinned with his perfect smile. "And you'll never believe what I've been able to do with Labrador retrievers!"

They walked into a second lab where an overgrown orange puppy waited for them. An adorable eight year old girl with blonde ponytails was playing with it. "Uncle Gadget!" the girl cried as she gave him a great big hug.

"Penny!" Gadget crouched in order to hug her back. "My goodness how you've grown! Let me look at you!" Young Penny Dollar had her father's good looks, which in Gadget's opinion was more appropriate on a little girl. Green eyes, perfect skin, blonde hair and a unique high pitched throaty voice that was perfect for conveying both care and concern. She looked like the little girl from _Aliens_. It was obvious she would break hearts someday, while her clumsy uncle would break… his leg if he wasn't careful.

"Penny, dear, I want your Uncle Gadget to see the _dog_," her father gently scolded.

"Yup, that's a fine dog you've got there Nick," Gadget complemented.

"Now Gadget," Mister Dollar began, "you know that the Labrador is the most well-adjusted, intelligent and most well behaved dog in the world, right?"

"That's right," Gadget nodded. "And that's why they're the most expensive!"

"Well you know that Labradors are the most common Seeing Eye dog in the world right?" Dollar continued. "Because they're so smart, good tempered and easy to train right?"

"Yes…" Gadget decided to smile and nod. Dollar was losing him already.

"Well I've bred an even smarter breed of dog!" Dollar gushed. "A dog that can actually be taught to understand human speech! A dog that is smart enough to train itself! And get this!" He looked down at the dog. "Brain! Get me that newspaper!"

"Rough!" the dog was medium sized, but would probably grow a little more if its oversized feet were any indication. Its orange, almost fox red coat was shiny and lustrous. It walked over to the table, then stood up on its hind legs and reached with its foreleg for the newspaper. Incredibly, it forced its paw to open like a primitive raccoon-like hand to grasp the newspaper and drag it to the ground.

When it got back on all fours to pick up the paper with its mouth Dollar gave it another order. "Brain! With your hands! Pick up the paper with your hands and walk over to me on your hind legs!"

"Woof," the dog sighed as it complied. Incredibly, it held the newspaper with one paw and walked over to them on two legs like a human. It was like Snoopy from _Peanuts_ was flesh and blood or something.

"Why that's incredible!" Gadget gushed. "Can you teach him to fly a Sopwith Camel too?"

"No, but I'll bet he's the only dog in the world that can open a door for himself," Dollar chuckled.

"And clean up after himself," Sylvia added.

"Please, Dad, can't we keep him?" Penny asked. Her scratchy voice had such a melancholy sincerity that it was difficult to say 'no' to her.

"Now, Penny, you know that Brain isn't a household pet," her father shook his head. "He belongs to the world! He belongs to science!"

"Will science feed him, love him and give him a good home?" Gadget quipped.

"Don't tell me you're taking _her_ side?" Nick joked.

"I can't help it, Dollar," Gadget shrugged. "I've got a soft spot for dogs. My German Shepard died last month. If Brain didn't belong to science I'd take him off your hands myself."

"But I'd be able to call him back," Nick Dollar teased. "Sylvia gave Brain a dog collar with a communications system in it. It's on the same frequency as our watches. Observe…" he pushed a button on his watch and earphones and a microphone popped out of the dog's red collar. "Now we can communicate back and forth. Look how smart brain is." He spoke into the watch. "Brain, how many fingers does the human hand have?"

Brain barked five times.

"See?" Doctor Dollar smiled. "He's smart enough to talk back! That's why he has a microphone."

"Sorry but I'm not impressed," Gadget shook his head. "Not only could Brain hear you, but he could also see your hand."

"You don't understand!" Dollar frowned. "Brain is smart enough to answer questions, not just respond to commands or make requests! Don't you understand what that means?"

"It means that you need to be in the other room and keep him from looking at your hands," Gadget shrugged, completely missing the point.

"You know how Max is, dear," Sylvia shook her head as she held the door to her laboratory open Gadget and Nick. "Personally I think that Chief Quimby has the patience of a saint." As Gadget and Dollar left the room, she looked uncomfortably at Penny. "Penny, darling we need some grown up time with your Uncle Gadget. Maybe you ought to go home."

"Okay," the girl said disappointedly, then she brightened. "Can I take Brain home with me?" she asked. "Just for today I mean! You know, for protection!"

"You aren't just saying that because you know once Brain makes himself at home your father won't have the heart to send him back to the lab again are you?" Sylvia asked suspiciously.

"Maybe," Penny looked away guiltily.

"Go ahead," Sylvia Dollar nodded. "I think that a dog needs fresh air and a normal home and not a sterile lab. Besides they keep delivering dog food to my side of the building."

"Thanks Mom!" Penny hugged her. "You're the best! Come on Brain! Let's go home!"

As Sylvia closed the door and rejoined the adults, Gadget was asking questions. "Okay, now that you've shown me your latest experiments, why _did_ you ask me over here anyway?"

"We've been getting threats," Nick L. Dollar informed him. "If we don't turn over our research to an organization called MAD, they're threatening to blow up the lab."

"Mothers Against Drunk Driving?" Gadget scratched his head. "Why would they want to…?"

"Their leader is someone called Doctor Claw, I believe," Sylvia added.

"Oh! _MAD_!" Gadget's eyes widened in realization. "The international organization of evil! It's ran by a mastermind named Doctor Claw! Of course! 'MAD' with one 'D'! How silly of me! And they're threatening to blow you up? How dare they? Don't they realize we're related?"

At that moment, the doorbell rang. "This must be one of your dog food deliveries," Sylvia said.

"Just a minute, I'll get it," Gadget walked over to the door.

When he opened it, a short, bald little troll of a uniformed delivery man was holding a large box. "Package for Doctor Dollar," he said in a gruff but sneaky voice as he set the box down.

"I'll take it," Gadget said. "I'm Maxwell Gadget, Sylvia Dollar's brother. I'm an inspector with the Metro City Police Department."

"Sign here sir," the delivery man said as he handed the inspector a pen and a notepad.

"Turn around, I'll sign it on your back," Gadget said. When the delivery man complied a stylized symbol of a cat face with curved horns instead of ears was visible on the man's jacket and the capital letters 'M A D' were displayed prominently. Gadget ignored this as he put the pad on the delivery man's back and signed his name. "Here you go," Gadget handed the pad and pen to the delivery man afterwards. "Thanks for the delivery and have a nice day."

"You too sir," the delivery man said in a mischievous voice. "You go live life to the fullest while you can sir. Heh-heh-heh-heh," he laughed evilly.

"Thank you, I'll do that," Gadget said as he picked up the box and closed the door.

"What is it more dog food?" Sylvia asked.

"Nope," Gadget said as he opened the box and pulled out what appeared to be a cannon ball with a thick burning fuse on top of it. "Which one of you two ordered a bomb?" he asked nonchalantly before his eyes widened in surprise. "A _bomb_?"

"Get rid of it!" Nick cried.

Discarding the box, Gadget threw the bomb to Nick, who promptly threw it right back to him. Gadget then threw the bomb to Sylvia who caught it only to toss it back at her brother. Gadget caught it and appeared to dance a strange jig as he tried to decide what to do.

* * *

Outside, Penny was unlocking her bicycle. "You're going to love it at our house, Brain!" she said as she patted the dog's head. "We have this big backyard and we live in a good neighborhood. Hey, what is that man doing over by the window? Is he spying on my parents or something?" Suspicious, the child flattened herself against the wall and crept over to the short goblin of a deliveryman.

"I did what you told me, Doctor Claw," the short henchman said into his cell phone. "You were right, they _did_ call the cops. They're talking to a police inspector called 'Gadget' right now!"

"Gadget!" a deep bestial voice thundered from his cell phone. "It seems that my decision deliver a warning was a good one. With luck, Gadget will get blown up trying to get rid of that bomb!" Evil laughter chortled from the cell phone.

The little henchman laughed too. At least he did before the window broke and a black spherical old style bomb flew out and landed in his hands. "Yaah!" the henchman screamed before he tossed the bomb back inside.

"Did you see that, Brain?" Penny cried as she stopped sneaking and started running forward. "That looked like a bomb!"

A horrendous explosion erupted from the building knocking Penny, Brain and the little lackey off their feet. As smoke billowed out the windows, the henchman staggered to his feet and ran away.

"Oh no!" Penny cried as her green eyes widened in horror. "Mom! Dad! Uncle Gadget! Please no!"

_Next: We Can Rebuild Him_


	2. We Can Rebuild Him

**Inspector Gadget: The Pilot**

_Inspector Gadget and all related characters and setting are owned by __**Cookie Jar Entertainment**__. DiC now remains an in-credit name only. Robocop is owned by Orion Pictures. The Six Million Dollar Man is owned by Universal Studios._

_Chapter Two: We Can Rebuild Him_

"You idiot!" Doctor Claw roared at his henchman. "The bomb was supposed to be a warning! You weren't supposed to _kill_ the scientists and destroy their research!"

"At least we got Gadget, Doctor Claw," the nervous lackey pointed out.

"Yes," the mysterious mastermind chuckled. "I suppose you're right. We can cut our losses knowing that this is the last we shall ever see of Inspector Gadget!"

* * *

Inspector Gadget woke up to the sounds of rhythmic electronic beeps. He could hear Chief Quimby's voice but didn't understand what he was saying. He did hear the word 'Gadget' a few times so the Chief was either talking _to_ him or _about_ him. "I'll get right on it, Chief," Gadget muttered. "You know me. I'm always on duty."

"Gadget!" the Chief exclaimed as he walked over to him. He was a short blonde fireplug of a man with a full mustache who smoked a pipe. "You're alive! Er… I mean… you're awake! How are you feeling?"

Gadget opened his eyes. Blinding lights glared down at him. He couldn't get up.

"Allow me," a high pitched elderly voice piped.

Gadget felt his body move from a horizontal to a vertical position. At least he wasn't looking into the blinding lights anymore. He was in a sterile room that looked like a combination of a surgical operating theatre and a computer/electronics room that belonged at NASA's mission control.

"What happened, Chief?" Gadget asked as his strength returned.

"There was an explosion," Quimby informed him nervously. "You were injured. I'm sorry Gadget, but you were the only survivor…"

"The only survivor!" Gadget protested, as he recalled playing catch with a bomb with his sister and her husband. "Don't tell me that Sylvia and Nicholas are dead!"

"I'm sorry Gadget," the Chief repeated sadly. "Nicholas and Sylvia Dollar are dead. You were the only survivor."

"I asked you not to tell me that!" Gadget said snippily. "That's it! Doctor Claw has gone too far this time! I'm going to take him and his organization down if it's the last thing I do! Let me out of here!" Gadget strained against his bonds. He was strapped down to an operating table by metal bands like he was Frankenstein's Monster or something. "Omigosh! Penny! Is she all right?"

"She was outside the building at the time," Quimby informed him. "Your niece is okay and she's provided us with a sketch of the culprit. Don't worry, Gadget we'll get him. You just take it easy."

"I'm not going to take it easy, Chief!" Gadget snapped. "Doctor Claw has murdered my sister! Get me out of this thing! Why am I being restrained?"

"Like I said, you were injured," Quimby informed him.

"Injured?" Gadget asked. "How injured? Don't tell me I lost my leg!"

Chief Quimby's face paled.

"My leg?" Gadget repeated nervously. "Which one? I _did_ only lose one, right Chief? Don't tell me I lost _both_ of my legs!"

"I'm sorry Gadget," Quimby muttered. "You lost both of your legs."

"I asked you not to tell me that," Gadget sighed. "Both of them huh? Well I won't let a little thing like a wheelchair stop me! I've still got two hands, right Chief? Right Chief?"

The Chief looked away.

"Don't tell me I've lost an arm too!" Gadget protested. "Which one was it, Chief? It wasn't my right arm, was it? 'Cause I do everything with my right hand!"

"Er uh, um," Quimby stammered.

"It _was _my right arm, wasn't it Chief?" Gadget asked sternly. "Well, I won't let that stop me! I've still got my left!" When Quimby didn't respond he repeated himself. "Did you hear that, Chief? I said I've still got my left!"

His boss could only give him a sick apologetic look.

"I still got my left, don't I Chief?" Gadget asked as his voice lost enthusiasm.

"Well… Uh… No…"

"Now wait a minute," Gadget said sternly. "This is getting ridiculous. If I don't have any limbs why am I strapped down?"

"Well… technically you _do_ have limbs," the Chief admitted. "Even though you _did_ lose them all…"

"How do you figure that?" Gadget asked. "You've got to pick a lane, Chief. You can't have it both ways."

"Actually, we can," Quimby scratched the back of his neck.

"Because you now have replacement limbs," A stooped bespectacled old man informed him.

"Gadget, I'd like to introduce you to Professor von Slickstein, the father of modern bionics," Quimby patted the elderly scientist's shoulder. "He operated on you and saved your life."

"I managed to extract your nervous system out of your ruined tissues," the elderly scientist gushed proudly. "The human nervous system is still the most efficient communications system on the planet and the brain is the greatest computer…"

"Please, Professor, spare me the details," Gadget muttered as his face took on a greenish hue. "Just give me the big picture."

"I've replaced your damaged parts with biomechanical replacements," the professor informed him.

"Huh?"

"Did you ever see _Robocop_, Gadget?" Quimby sighed.

"Yes I did Chief," Gadget sighed, "but I didn't like the movie enough to play the title role. How much of me is left anyway?"

"Not a lot," Quimby admitted. "To be honest, some of your internal organs came from your sister."

"Spare me the details, Chief!" Gadget groaned. "So now what? Do I have armor plating or something?"

"Oh no, nothing like that," Professor von Slickstein assured him. "_The Six Million Dollar Man _was my favorite television program when I was young. I vowed to find a way to make a bionic man for real. A bionic man that would look perfectly normal to the naked eye. And now, forty years later, I've finally done it! And my bionic man is a secret agent who fights crime, just like Steve Austin! It's like a dream come true!"

"Professor, please!" Quimby protested. "We're talking about a human being here!"

"Oh sorry about that," the Professor blushed. "Didn't mean to be so enthusiastic about it. My wife said the same thing. This morning she gave me a psychology book on how to help patients cope with loss."

"This all a joke, right?" Gadget smiled. "There's no such thing as a bionic man. You're both pulling my leg!"

"No Gadget, we're dead serious," Quimby shook his head.

"It's all right, Mister Quimby," von Slickstein assured him. "He believes you. What you are witnessing is one of the earliest stages of coping with loss. Inspector Gadget is experiencing Stage One: Denial."

"No I'm not," Gadget protested. "I'm not denying anything!"

"There," the Professor smiled. "See what I mean?"

"Shut up you lousy know-it-all!" Gadget growled. "You did this! You did this to me! You could have saved more of my human parts but you had to play God! When I get loose I'm going to rip you limb from limb!"

"Now calm down, Gadget!" Quimby admonished nervously.

"Fascinating," von Slickstein nodded. "He has already passed through Stage One and is now experiencing Stage Two: Anger."

"How long do these stages last, Professor?" asked a worried Quimby. "I mean, how long does it take for the patient to cope and come to terms with his loss?"

"Well, the book was rather vague on that," von Slickstein admitted. "It varies from patient to patient. Sometimes it takes years but sometimes it can go very quickly."

"Hey Professor?" Gadget smiled weakly. "I'm sorry about that crack about limb from limb. I didn't mean it okay? You're a brilliant scientist aren't you? You could take samples from what's left of me and clone me some new body parts can't you? Sure it might take a while and there'll be a lot of painful surgery, but eventually I'll be a human being again right?"

"Ah, we are now at Stage Three: Bargaining," the Professor nodded. "Your Inspector Gadget is a very strong man. Usually it takes much longer for a subject to pass through the stages of grief."

"It's over!" Gadget moaned. "My life is over! I'm a Frankenstein freak who will never lead a normal life! Why did you even save me, anyhow? Just pull the plug and let me die already!"

"Gadget!" Quimby gasped. "Don't talk like that! Professor, something's gone wrong! Is this supposed to happen?"

"I'm afraid so," the old man nodded sadly. "Inspector Gadget has now progressed to the fourth stage of the grieving process: Depression. I don't know how long he'll remain like this before he finally reaches Stage Five: Acceptance."

"Well, no sense crying over spilled milk!" the bionic detective said cheerfully. "Come on Chief. Let me out of this. The sooner I get used to my mechanical limbs the sooner I can get back to work."

"Gadget?" Quimby asked hesitantly. "Are you sure you're all right?"

"Why of course," he nodded confidently. "Why do ask that Chief?"

"You _were_ just saying you wanted to die just now," Quimby said quietly.

"Come on now, Chief, we're past that!" Gadget shrugged. "I can't die! With Sylvia and Nick gone I'm the only one Penny's got left!"

"That's right!" Quimby's eyes widened in hope. "You've got to be strong Gadget… for Penny's sake!"

"Right, now let me out here," Gadget nodded gutlessly. "I've got to learn how to handle my new body. If I take Penny's hand I don't want to pull her arm off."

"Don't worry, you're not that kind of cyborg," von Slickstein assured him as he hobbled over to a control panel and pulled a lever. The metal bands restraining the inspector retracted into the table allowing his feet to touch the floor.

Gadget stumbled over to a full length mirror set into the wall. He still had his own face, which was something of a disappointment. His body still looked like his. He was wearing a surgical gown, and his head was bandaged up so much it looked like he was wearing a white turban. Strangely he was wearing gloves and shoes. Idly, he tried to take one of his gloves off but it was on tight. "Uh, Professor…?"

"Oh that?" von Slickstein said. "Those are your hands. I'm still working on a more realistic set of hands for you. I should have them finished by next summer."

"Next Summer?" Gadget repeated sarcastically. "What about my feet? Are you telling me I can't take off my shoes either?"

"Your new feet should be ready for you by Christmas," von Slickstein assured him.

"Oh," Gadget put his hands on the sides of his head and bent over. "I think I'm getting one of your headaches, Chief."

"That's all right, Gadget, I understand," Quimby nodded.

"At least I have the satisfaction of knowing I was reassembled in the most advanced and state of the art laboratories in the country," Gadget remarked. At that moment, a bulb on the array of lights above the operating table burnt out. Actually it kind of shattered, and the sound of tinkling glass was audible. "What?" Gadget turned and peered at the shattered bulb. Suddenly, before Chief Quimby's horrified gaze, Inspector Gadget's neck was elongating, transforming from an ordinary throat into a telescoping metal tube that allowed his head to reach the level of the high ceiling. "Ah here we are Professor," Gadget said breezily. "You have a burnt out bulb. It blew. That goes to show you that you never can tell if…" his voice trailed away as he turned and looked down at Quimby and Slickstein. "What are you two doing down there?"

"G-Gadget!" Quimby choked. "N-now try to keep c-calm!"

"Look this bulb needs to be replaced," Gadget remarked, blissfully unaware that his neck was now over four feet long. "If one of you could get me a ladder, or…" He glanced down at himself, getting dizzy as he saw his own body four feet below where it should be. His hands instinctively reached up to his neck, or rather, the telescoping metal tube that had replaced his neck. As his hands probed his neck, his face expression when from a puzzled frown to a look of alarm.

"Don't worry Gadget!" Quimby called up to him before shooting von Slickstein a dirty look. "I'm sure that Professor von Slickstein can sort it out."

"It's okay Chief. I know what's going on," Gadget assured him in a calm voice. "I know the drill. I've watched a lot of movies. This is the part where I scream uncontrollably and ask God what I've become. Might as well get it out of my system," he shrugged.

"Now Gadget…!" Quimby began.

Without warning, Inspector Gadget started shouting as loud as he could while his arms extended telescopically just as his neck had done. "AAAAAAH!" Gadget screamed while his ankles appeared by be replaced by impossibly long metal springs. "Why God? Why? WHAT HAVE I BECOME? AAAAAAAAH! Whoa!"

Inspector Gadget's screaming fit ended as abruptly as it began as he lost his balance and fell to the floor in a mass of overextended arms and legs. Now that his legs had released what appeared to be two giant Slinkies, they weren't the same size as each other anymore. "Uh, Professor?" he asked ruefully. "A little help?"

"Hm, perhaps I should install a voice activation system for your bionic implants," von Slickstein murmured.

"Yeah maybe you ought to," Quimby agreed as he stared at an almost catatonic Inspector Gadget.

* * *

In the meantime, Penny Dollar was in protective custody at a police safe house. "How did I get myself into this Brain?" the teary-eyed adolescent moaned. "They won't tell me what happened to Mom, Dad, and Uncle Gadget! I don't know if they're alive or dead! What are we going to do?"

Brain's sympathetic bark sounded like a polite cough.

"I'm the only one who can identify the MAD bomber and _I'm_ the one being locked up!" she complained. "It just isn't fair! They could at least let me visit the hospital. That way I'd know how my family is doing!"

"Woof," Brain nodded in agreement.

"Uncle Gadget is a police inspector!" she continued. "Why isn't he on the case? How come _he_ hasn't been asking me questions? He must be really hurt if he's not…" Penny covered her mouth with her hands and gasped in horror. Her jade green eyes narrowed in a determined frown. "Well whoever is behind this isn't going to catch me napping a second time! I swear that from now on I'm going to keep my eyes and ears open!"

"Woof!" Brain nodded and raised his forepaw to his eye to give a snappy salute.

_Next: Stiletto_


	3. Gadget's Apartment

**Inspector Gadget: The Pilot**

_Inspector Gadget and all related characters and setting are owned by __**Cookie Jar Entertainment**__. DiC now remains an in-credit name only. _

_Chapter Three: Gadget's Apartment_

Doctor Claw was not a happy man. He was an evil man. A ruthless man. But not a happy man. He was sitting at a desk watching a news broadcast on his computer. A police sketch of one of his agents was on the screen. "Police are searching for this man in connection with the explosion at Dollar Labs," a reporters voice said. "Approximately five foot six, bald, with a prominent chin…"

With a push of his metal gloved finger, Doctor Claw shut off the broadcast. On his monitor, the police sketch vanished to be replaced with a flesh and blood image of the agent that delivered the bomb to Dollar Labs. "Stiletto!" the doctor's deep bestial voice roared. "The police have a description of you!"

"I don't understand it," the MAD agent known as Stiletto muttered apologetically. "Only Inspector Gadget saw my face, and he was inside when the bomb went off."

"It's obvious that he survived and is actively hunting you," Doctor Claw deep voice echoed around the poorly lit chamber. "Your arrest could compromise our entire operation here in Metro City. Eliminate Gadget before I eliminate you!"

"Y-yes Doctor Claw!" Stiletto stammered nervously as he punched the side of his head as a bizarre kind of salute. "Don't worry! Me and the boys will be waiting for him at his apartment!"

"See to it," Claw rumbled. "Make Gadget disappear… before _you_ do…"

As Stiletto gulped in fear a large overweight cat hopped up on Claw's desk to laugh at the henchman's distress.

* * *

Penny could barely remember the police psychiatrist telling her that her parents hadn't survived the explosion. She remembered the world closing in on her. The pain that seemed trapped behind her eyes, down her throat and beneath her skin, unable to get out. She remembered her vision getting blurry from tears and clenching her fists so tightly that her hands still hurt. But she didn't remember the exact words the therapist used. She _certainly_ didn't remember screaming hysterically or attacking the therapist, but she was polite enough to apologize in a hoarse voice for the black eye he had suffered. She _did_ remember that her parents were dead and that she would now be living with her Uncle Gadget.

Uncle Gadget! That meant that Uncle Gadget had survived, and was physically able to take her home. That meant he wasn't hurt, at least not seriously. After he had recovered from surgery and the doctors finished his tests she would be able to see him, the psychiatrist had told her. What did _that _mean? What _kind_ of surgery? _What_ tests?

"How is he Professor?" Chief Quimby asked him as he and another man entered Professor von Slickstein's warehouse size lab.

"Coping," von Slickstein nodded. "No Mister Gadget," he said to the bionic inspector. "Try it again."

"Go-go Gadget _arm_!" Inspector Gadget shouted. His arm telescoped forwards down the firing range and punched through a paper target. "Handy if I want to change the channel without a remote control," he quipped.

Chief Quimby gestured to the middle aged man who had entered with him. "Gadget, I'd like to introduce you to Doctor Hector Montoya, the best physical therapist in the country. He's going to help you get used to your new body."

"Pleased to meet you, Mister Montoya," Gadget said as he turned around to shake the physical therapist's hand. The hand attached to the arm that had telescoped out twenty feet to hit the target and still hadn't retracted. Gadget's metal arm hit Quimby in the face causing him to stumble to the floor and almost hit Montoya. "Sorry about that Chief," Gadget shrugged self-consciously.

Quimby grunted as he dusted himself off and rose to his feet. "You've got your work cut out for you, Montoya," the Chief muttered. "I'll be back in a few hours to check on your progress. In the meantime I'm going to pick up Gadget's niece. I'm going to do my best to fill her in on a few things before she gets here."

"Thanks Chief," Gadget nodded. "Don't worry about a thing. I'll be back on duty in no time. You'll see."

"No you won't," Quimby shook his head. "As of two days ago, you're on sick leave. Even if you somehow make a full recovery I'm giving you some time off so you can spend some time with your niece. The girl has lost _both_ her parents, Gadget. _You're_ her family now. You've got to be both mother and father for her, and I think your injuries are the perfect excuse to give both of you some time to adjust."

"Gosh, Chief, I don't know what to do!" Gadget admitted. "I know some of our cases involved the safety of the free world, but this seems so much bigger! How am I going to adjust living with a child? I won't be able to swear like a sailor, smoke cigars, drink alcohol and have women over anymore!"

"You never did those things _before_ your accident, Gadget," the Chief pointed out.

"Yeah, but what if I want to try something new?" Gadget insisted childishly. "And my home! What am I going to do? A little girl is coming over! Do you know what it's like having a messy apartment with toys and dollies all over the floor?"

"Gadget, she's eight," Quimby assured him. "You've got to be patient with her. Just tell her that she'll have to learn to put her toys and dollies away."

"Who said they were _hers_?" Gadget protested. "I've got to go home and put my toys away before she marches into the place and starts stepping on them!"

Quimby hoped he was joking. "Maybe you should stay over at your niece's house. She'll probably be able to adjust better sleeping in a familiar bed anyway. Tell you what, I'll uh, give you a few hours to pull yourself together before I bring Penny over, okay?"

"Sure thing, Chief," Gadget nodded as he used his left hand to pull his overextended right arm back into his sleeve. "Don't worry about a thing! I'll have my new body under control before you get back! You'll see!"

* * *

Later that day, Quimby's car pulled into the parking lot. "Thanks for picking us up, Chief Quimby," Penny said as the car came to a stop.

"Think nothing of it, Penny," the Chief said as good-naturedly as he could.

"And thanks for taking me and Brain out for ice cream," Penny teased as they got out of the car.

"It was the least I could do," Quimby blushed slightly as he locked the car.

"And taking us to the boardwalk," the little girl added knowingly as she followed him towards the large flat two story building. "Look I know your trying to make me feel better…"

"I know," the Chief sighed, shaking his head at his own stupidity. Penny might not be able to eat that flavor of ice cream ever again. Way to go, Quimby.

"…but I'd feel better if I could see my Uncle Gadget," Penny continued as they entered. "After what happened I've got to know he's all right…" she stopped as her voice cracked. "I mean," she whispered. "After all that's happened he's all Brain and I have left." Penny looked out the window. She had to stop these uncountable crying fits! Everybody thought she was a little kid as it was and now… Penny flinched as her throat seemed to clench like a fist.

"Penny?" Quimby asked in concern. Brain whined in sympathy.

"I'm all right," she smiled bravely. "You know how it is. It comes and goes."

He nodded encouragingly. That was a tough little kid. Chief Quimby had never gotten comfortable with the idea of lady cops but this kid had what it takes. If this horrible loss doesn't mess her up she'd make a fine soldier someday. He cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Um, you know that your Uncle Gadget was injured in the explosion, right Penny?"

"Yes, is he all right?" Penny asked earnestly.

Quimby sighed. Everything this child did was so heartfelt and sincere. How could he tell her that when her Uncle had been brought into Professor von Slickstein's laboratory he was just a collection of body parts being kept alive in jars? He hadn't worked up the courage to tell _Gadget_ yet. "He um… needed a lot of surgery. You might find him uh… different than you remember him…"

"You've been saying that all day," Penny pointed out. "Is he… hideously disfigured or something?"

"Not that you can see on the outside," Quimby admitted. Most of the time. "But you have to understand that some of your Uncle's injuries…" he trailed off. If only she was a little older this might be easier. "Just a minute, I'd like to see how his physical therapy is going."

"But..."

"You have to understand, your uncle is a very proud man," Quimby told her. "He wants to appear as strong has he can be for you."

"That's okay, Chief Quimby, I understand," Penny nodded. "He's just looking out for me."

The Chief nodded, took a deep breath and left the little girl and her dog in the waiting area. He entered the physical therapy area and was shocked to see so many holes in the wall. "Montoya?"

"Over here," the physical therapist said as he sat at a desk with his back to the police chief. "I'm just filling out Inspector Gadget's release form. His physical therapy is complete."

"Are you sure?" Chief Quimby asked as he studied what appeared to be a _burnt _hole in the wall. How had _that_ happened?

"Quite sure," Montoya said as he got up from the desk and turned to hand Quimby the medical form. Quimby was surprised to see the black eye Montoya had and the bandages wrapped around his left hand. "Let me put it this way: There's nothing more _I_ can do for Inspector Gadget."

"Thanks, Montoya, you did your best," Quimby sighed as he shook his good hand before the injured and somewhat irate physical therapist left the room.

"You know what, Chief?" Gadget said as he walked out of the changing room. "I think that Doctor Montoya is a little accident prone."

Quimby gave Gadget a stern look, but remained silent.

* * *

Hector Montoya passed Penny in the waiting room.

"Oh!" Penny squeaked. "Are you one of the patients here?"

"Nope," Montoya said without slowing his pace to the door. "I'm one of the doctors."

"Oh dear," Penny put her hand to her mouth in concern.

"Woof," Brain agreed as the Montoya limped out.

"Penny, here's your uncle," Chief Quimby's voice said.

Penny and Brain turned to see Chief Quimby escorting her Uncle Gadget into the lobby, and he was walking unassisted without even needing a cane! Usually patients were given wheelchairs even when they made a full recovery weren't they? Her Uncle Gadget was wearing a grey raincoat with a matching fedora over a white shirt, black tie and blue pants. Black shoes and brown gloves completed his ensemble. Why was he wearing gloves? Was he missing a finger?

"Uncle Gadget!" Penny gushed as she ran over and hugged him. "I'm so glad you're all right!" Brain made some whining sounds and he stood up on his hind legs to hug Gadget too.

"Don't worry Penny, I'm okay!" Gadget assured her. "It will take more than a bomb I promise you. I'm made of sterner stuff." Although exactly _what_ stuff was anyone's guess. "Come on you must be tired. Let's go back to my apartment so I get a duffle bag for an overnighter at your place."

"Okay," Chief Quimby nodded. "I'll drive you."

* * *

When Quimby pulled up in front of Gadget's apartment building he pointed at the yellow Volkswagen beetle parked across the street. "There's your car, Gadget. Goodbye and take it easy for a while. I'll see you in a few weeks."

"But Chief, I keep telling you, I don't need any sick leave!" Gadget protested. "Professor von Slickstein put me back together and I'm raring to go!"

"All right, Gadget, have it your way," Chief Quimby sighed. "You want in on the Dollar case? Fine. Your assignment is to bodyguard the only witness that can identify the man who blew you up and killed your sister and your brother-in-law."

"I'm on it, Chief!" Gadget crowed. "You know me; I'm always on duty. Just give me the name and the location and I won't let the witness out of my sight!"

"Her name is Penny Dollar and she's in the back seat," Quimby pointed at the girl and her dog with his thumb. "Congratulations, Gadget. You've just earned yourself a working vacation. Penny, take care of your uncle for me."

"Yes sir," Penny nodded seriously. "Don't worry. I won't let anything happen to my Uncle Gadget. Come on Brain," she said as she opened the door to exit the car.

"That was sneaky and underhanded Chief," Gadget protested. "If this is a working vacation, I gotta ask you: Is this coming out of my sick days?"

"Get out of the car, Gadget," Quimby frowned.

"Okay, Chief," Gadget said as he got out.

"I don't know which of you has the more difficult assignment," he muttered as he drove off.

"Well, Penny, here we are," Gadget said airily as they entered the lobby. He stopped to pick up his mail before heading for the elevator. "I just need to pick up a few things and then I'll take you home. You must be eager to get back after spending time with the social workers."

"Boy I am I ever," Penny nodded. "It will be good to be home again!"

* * *

Meanwhile inside Gadget's apartment, Stiletto and several MAD agents were waiting for them. "Okay, that was him outside," Stiletto hissed. Get into position and stay out of sight. He'll never know what hit him!"

"Good," muttered a large MAD operative as he rubbed his posterior painfully. "I owe that moron. I nearly broke my neck tripping over his toys and dollies!"

* * *

"The place is a bit of a mess, Penny but I haven't been here for a few days," Gadget said as he put his key in the door. "I wasn't expecting company," he added as he tried the door. "Darn it, this door always sticks," he grumbled. "I'll give it a taste of my shoulder."

Gadget forced the door and stumbled in, right into a MAD agent wielding a pistol with a silencer in his hand. The MAD agent dropped the pistol as hefell over backwards but he quickly scrambled to his feet.

"Hey!" Gadget protested. "This is my apartment! What are you doing here? I've got this place paid off 'til the end of the month!"

"You're checking out, Gadget!" the bad guy said as he took a swing at the bionic detective.

"That's what you think!" Gadget sneered as he dodged the blow. "You can't take my apartment! I still live here! Go-go-Gadget arm!" Before the henchman's disbelieving eyes, Gadget's arm snaked out of his sleeve to miss him by inches! The inspector's clenched fist kept going until it hit Stiletto, who was hiding behind the curtains in front of Inspector Gadget's window. The blow knocked him right out the window and down onto the street. "You get out of here! I'm going to speak to my landlord about this!" Gadget shouted as he seized the burly hitman with his mechanical hands. Another thug emerged from the closet near the door, but Gadget knocked him down as he pushed the first assassin out the door and into the hall. "Get yourself someplace else to live!" Gadget shouted. "I'm not dead yet, for crying out loud!" He slammed the door on the two stunned henchman. "The nerve of those guys!" the inspector grumbled as he clapped the dust off his gloved hands.

"Uncle Gadget… what was that?" Penny stammered.

"What was what?" Gadget asked.

"Did I just see your arm stretch over fifteen feet?" Penny asked.

"Oh that?" Gadget shrugged. "Just a little invention Professor von Slickstein cooked up. That squatter fell for the old phony hand trick!"

_Next: Burger Queen_


	4. Burger Queen

**Inspector Gadget: The Pilot**

_Inspector Gadget and all related characters and setting are owned by __**Cookie Jar Entertainment**__. DiC now remains an in-credit name only. _

_Chapter Four: Burger Queen_

In Inspector Gadget's second floor apartment, Penny Dollar glanced to the floor stare at the firearm the assassin had left behind. "He dropped an automatic pistol!" Penny gasped. "I don't think he was a squatter, Uncle Gadget!"

"Urf," the golden Labrador called Brain added nervously.

"Goodness Penny," he said as he surveyed the apartment's messy floor. "Look at all the toys and dollies I left on the floor..."

"That pistol has a silencer on it!" Penny insisted. "Uncle Gadget, I think those men were here to kill you!"

"Er… I mean, _those kids _left on the floor that last time I babysat," Gadget blushed. "Babysat. That's the ticket. These toys aren't mine. I uh… babysit to supplement my income sometimes. One night, I once looked after thirty of the neighborhood kids at once. Would you believe it? Thirty children at once!"

"Uncle Gadget, I'm not a little kid," the eight-year-old insisted. "Those men had guns and they were here to kill you!"

"Er… would you believe twenty kids?" Gadget asked nervously.

"Who were those men?" Penny continued as she walked over to the window. "Are they still outside?"

"Ten kids?" Gadget offered. "One? How about I once stored a vintage first addition Baby Alive doll that had never been removed from the box in my closet?"

Brain rolled his eyes and groaned.

"Your window is broken, Uncle Gadget!" Penny announced. "The broken glass is on the outside. It looks like you knocked somebody out the window when your mechanical hand hit the curtains!"

"Well that does it!" Gadget growled as he stormed over to his telephone.

"Are you going to call the police, Uncle Gadget?" his niece asked him.

"No I'm calling my landlord," Gadget told her as he picked up his telephone. "I've got to let him know that I'm still alive and kicking or who knows who he'll let this apartment out to? And while he's at it, he can fix the window. In the meantime, can you clean up some of these toys, Penny? I don't want the people who will be repairing that window stepping on them."

"Uh, sure Uncle Gadget," Penny said. "I'll start with this one." The girl trotted into the kitchen and searched the drawers until she found a large freezer bag. Pulling a pencil off a notepad, she came back into the front room and knelt down before the gun. Carefully, she stuck the pencil down the barrel and picked up the gun. "Okay, Brain, open the freezer bag." The dog fumbled with the Ziploc seal on the plastic bag but managed to use his forepaws to get it open. "We have to be careful because I don't think the safety is on."

"Woof!" Brain's eyes bulged in fear as Penny slipped the pistol into the baggie.

"We've got to be careful," she repeated. "We don't want to smudge any fingerprints." She glanced over at her oblivious uncle. Did he really think that the killer's gun was just one of his toys? "Okay, here's the plan: If Uncle Gadget doesn't call the police we'll use the phone to tip off Chief Quimby ourselves."

"Bow wow," Brain nodded seriously. "Urk!" he whined as his eye bulged out.

"What is it, Brain?" Penny turned around to see what her dog was looking at. "Oh!"

Gadget's arms were telescoping out to gather up his toys. As he bent over, an extra gloved hand on a skinny metal arm snaked out of the crown of his hat to assist. It had to be the most eerie and strange things she had ever seen.

"What… are those?" Penny asked him.

"It's like I told you," her uncle assured her. "Professor von Slickstein built them."

"What's… Professor von Slickstein a professor _of_?" Penny asked hesitantly.

"Uh… lots of stuff," Gadget waffled. "Robotics, bionics, that sort of thing. He even gave me a book on how to cope with loss…"

"Bionics?" his niece repeated. "You mean Biological Electronics? As in cybernetic implants? Are you a cyborg, Uncle Gadget?"

"What?" Gadget's eyes squinted in confusion.

"Do you have robot arms instead of flesh and blood ones?" Penny asked pointblank. "Can you take those robot arms off or are you stuck with them?"

"My look at the time," Gadget said airily. "I better get packing if I want to get you home before dark."

* * *

Outside three MAD agents regrouped and tried to figure out what went wrong. "Man he's quick," the big one named Hunk complained, "and strong."

"He hasn't called for backup," the bald one named Stiletto commented, "and we haven't been picked up. Maybe he thinks we've given up."

"If we want to get him before tomorrow morning, we should go into the building across the street and set up a sniper position, the tall slender one named Rocky suggested. "It doesn't seem smart to get in close quarters with him again."

Stiletto's cell phone rang and the little thug paled. Hesitantly he answered it. "Report!" the deep bestial voice of Doctor Claw barked. "Has Gadget been silenced yet?" the criminal mastermind queried.

"Er uh, not yet Doctor Claw," Stiletto stammered, "but we have him cornered in his apartment. Rocky suggested we take up a sniper position…"

"Make Gadget disappear, before I make _you_ disappear," Doctor Claw threatened. "If Gadget identifies you I promise that you won't be around to testify."

"D-don't worry sir!" said a nervous Stiletto. "We'll get him this time!"

"See that you do," Claw murmured before he hung up.

* * *

"Okay, that's everything," Gadget said as he closed his suitcase. "Pajamas, pillow, toothbrush, teddy bear and several changes of clothes. I can get anything else I need later."

"Teddy bear?" Penny giggled. "What does a grown man like you need that for?"

"If I don't take my teddy bear the gollywoggles might get me!" he said melodramatically.

"Oh uncle, you're so funny," Penny snickered. "Thanks for clowning around and trying to make me feel better." Suddenly she frowned in concentration. "You _are_ just clowning around, right Uncle Gadget?"

"Okay, let's go," Gadget replied as he picked up his suitcase and headed for the door. "Shall we pick up something to eat on the way home, or should I take you out?" he asked as they left the apartment.

"There's a Burger Queen on the way to my house," Penny suggested. "It's on the corner of Fifth and Parker."

"Oh yes, I know the one," he said as they got in the elevator. The mechanical hand emerged from his hat to push the button and the doors closed.

"Um, Uncle Gadget?" Penny asked hesitantly. "How do you control that thing that comes out of your hat? Do you have a remote control in your pocket?"

"Now Penny," he laughed. "If I told you that, it would give away the joke." To be honest, Inspector Gadget had no idea how he controlled the 'Gadget-hand'. Professor von Slickstein had mentioned something about the nervous system being a communications system before he installed the voice activation software. For all that stuff to be in his hat should make it too heavy to lift but the fedora was just the weight of a normal hat. Did all that stuff come out of his head? If so, where was his brain? He decided not to think about it. There was no point going insane with the horror of what he had become. Penny needed him. And as much as he hated to admit it, he needed her too.

* * *

"Boss! There he is!" Rocky said as the trio emerged onto the street.

"Okay!" Stiletto announced as they watched Gadget, Penny and Brain head to the yellow Volkswagen. "That must be his car," he said as Gadget placed his suitcase in the trunk hidden under the hood. "Here's our chance!"

* * *

"All right," Gadget announced from the driver's seat as Penny entered the passenger seat and Brain got in the back. "On to Burger Queen!"

"Excuse me sir," Hunk tapped on the window on the driver's side.

"Yes?" Inspector Gadget said as he rolled down the window. "What can I do for you, my good man?"

"Uncle Gadget!" Penny gasped. "That's the same man who tried to shoot you!"

Hunk drew a pistol and pointed it in Gadget's face, but Brain stuck his head out the car window and sunk his teeth into the assassin's arm. "Yowch!" Hunk cried as he dropped his gun onto Gadget's lap. It bounced off his artificial legs to disappear under the seat.

"Brain!" Gadget scolded. "Bad dog! What has gotten into you? I thought Labradors weren't that kind of dog! Do you want me to get sued?"

Brain growled and refused to let go of the struggling Hunk.

"Go-go Gadget hands!" the crown of Inspector Gadget's fedora opened and two gloved hands attached to skinny bands of metal emerged to grab ahold of Brain's muzzle and jaw. "Let go! Let go of him Brain! I hope you've got your shots!"

Hunk managed to free his arm and took off running.

"Uncle Gadget!" Penny gasped. "That's the same man from your apartment!"

"Who? The squatter?" Gadget asked. "I hope not. He could use Brain's actions as leverage to get my apartment away from me! Come on let's go before anybody sees us! The last thing we need is for him to demand that Brain be put down!"

Brain whined and cowered in the back seat as the Volkswagen moved forward.

* * *

"What went wrong?" Stiletto asked Hunk.

"His dog bit me!" the burly henchmen said while cradling his arm.

"That Gadget has more lives than a cat," Rocky muttered.

"Quick! To the van!" Stiletto ordered. "After them!"

* * *

"I'm sorry, Penny I haven't been setting a very good example," Gadget sighed as they drove down the street. "I should stay and take responsibility for what happened back there."

"No that's okay, Uncle Gadget, I'm good," Penny nodded. Any excuse to leave seemed like a good one. Had Uncle Gadget somehow not noticed the pistol the goon had pointed at him or was he simply hoping that Penny hadn't noticed? Was she cramping his style and placing him additional jeopardy simply by being present or was her uncle completely oblivious to the world?

Uncle Gadget had never seemed very bright in the past but Penny assumed that was because he was all detective and was socially awkward amongst 'normal folks'. As an eight-year-old super genius, she could relate. But Uncle Gadget seemed to be wearing blinders! How could anyone be a detective and be so unobservant?

It couldn't be. Uncle Gadget simply didn't want her to be scared. That's why he was playing dumb. If there was one thing Uncle Gadget never had trouble with, it was playing dumb. It was obvious the way he did the right thing but made ridiculous excuses so Penny wouldn't know how close they came to being killed. Uncle Gadget must have nerves of steel. And if he couldn't take off those artificial hands, who knew what else he had that was made of steel?

The Yellow Volkswagen pulled into the drive thru lane at Burger Queen, not realizing that they were being followed by three thugs in a blue van. "Look he's pulling into the Burger Queen," Rocky said as he brandished a pistol. "Here's our chance to…"

"No, no more guns," Stiletto snapped as he slapped Rocky's hand. "Hunk has lost two guns already! They're stuck in the drive thru. I've got a better idea…"

* * *

When Gadget's car pulled up to the drive thru window, it was Rocky who was working at the counter. The slender hoodlum was dressed in the Burger Queen uniform and appeared to be an employee. "Here's your order sir," he said as he handed the hot bags of food to the inspector.

"That's strange," Penny said. "He didn't ask for the money."

"He'll probably realize his mistake," Gadget said nonchalantly as he opened a bag of hamburgers. "In the meantime we'll sit here and check our order. The last time I went through a drive thru they got my order wrong."

"Uncle Gadget, is your double pounder bacon cheese queen sized burger ticking?" Penny asked in alarm.

"Why I believe you're right, Penny," Gadget said as he put his ear to a large cardboard burger box. A strange metal dish unfolded around his ear before disappearing again. "One of the employees must have lost his watch! How revolting! Who knows what else fell in there! They won't have to ask us for our money, I'm sending it back!" He turned and faced the drive thru window. "Go-go gadget arm," he said as he held the bags of food out the car window. Sure enough, his arm extended through the drive thru window and dropped the offending bags inside before retracting back into his sleeve. "Let's go get a pizza," he suggested as he drove off in disgust.

* * *

"Oh no!" Rocky gasped as Hunk and Stiletto emerged from locking the Burger Queen employees in the freezer.

The explosion broke every window in the fast food restaurant, but at least the employees were safe in the metal freezer. Stiletto, Rocky and Hunk weren't so lucky, but at least they managed to dive behind the counter at the last minute.

* * *

After they picked up the pizza Gadget took Penny home. It was a delightful two story home in the suburbs with a spacious yard and everything. Inspector Gadget attempted to make small talk but Penny interrupted him. "Uncle Gadget, is something wrong?" Penny could have kicked herself as she nibbled on her pizza slice. What a stupid question. Somebody tried to kill him twice. Of course something was wrong!

"Wrong Penny?" Inspector Gadget asked nonchalantly. Aside of your parents being blown to smithereens and your uncle being turned into a robot? "Why do you ask if anything's wrong?"

"You haven't taken your hat and coat off since we've been home," Penny pointed out. It was true. A hat and trenchcoat may have been appropriate outdoors weather permitting but it was strange to wear them inside. "You aren't planning to go anywhere are you?"

"Not really I wasn't planning on it," Gadget shrugged. To be honest, he wasn't really interested in taking _any_ of his clothes off. He didn't know if his body was covered in scars, or worse yet, naked metal. His gloves and shoes wouldn't come off; they were his hands and feet. If he took off his hat it might reveal a collection of bizarre machinery attached or even _emerging_ from a metallic skull. Who knows? No, he was quite comfortable wearing as much clothing as possible. If there was a game of strip poker count him _out_.

"Are you… okay Uncle Gadget?" Penny asked him.

"Why sure I'm fine," Gadget smiled. "The chief just thought I should take a few days off until we get our living situation straightened out. As soon as I fill out the paperwork, I'll be your legal guardian…" His voice trailed off when he saw the hurt expression in his niece's eyes. Her parents were dead. And now her idiot uncle thought he could just barge in and take their place. He took a deep breath and valiantly soldiered on. "Penny," he said gently. "I know that I'm no substitute for your mom and dad, but I love you and I'll be the best parent I can. I know I'm not perfect, but right now, I'm all you've got and quite honestly, you're all I've got."

"Don't you have any friends, Uncle Gadget?" Penny asked him.

"The problem is just about anyone could be a MAD agent so I've kept people at a distance," Gadget admitted. "To tell you the truth I've never really fit in anywhere. Your mom and dad were my closest friends, aside of Chief Quimby."

"It's all right, Uncle Gadget," Penny leaned across the table and put her tiny hand on Gadget's larger gloved one. "Somehow we'll get through this, and hey! What's the matter with your hand?"

Gadget quickly moved his hand away. "Boy look at the time!" he exclaimed as he got up. "Gotta get some sleep! Big day tomorrow! Time for bed!"

"But's it's barely six o'clock," Penny protested.

"I think I'll turn in early," Gadget yawned before he left the kitchen.

_Next: Promise Me _


	5. Promise Me

**Inspector Gadget: The Pilot**

_Inspector Gadget and all related characters and setting are owned by __**Cookie Jar Entertainment**__. DiC now remains an in-credit name only. _

_Chapter Five: Promise Me_

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here for the reading of the last will and testament of Nicholas Linus Dollar and Sylvia Gold Dollar…" the lawyer from Dewey, Cheetem and Howe read from a legal document.

Chief Quimby entered the room and discovered Gadget, Penny and Brain seated at the back dressed in dark somber colors. Even Brain's collar was black. Silently, Quimby sat down next to Gadget and took off his hat. "How was the funeral, Gadget? Any closure?"

"Aw Chief it was terrible," Gadget sighed. "Taking an eight-year-old girl to a funeral has got to be one of the most embarrassing things I've done in my life. All that crying, whining, and sobbing..."

"She lost both her parents, Gadget," Quimby pointed out.

"I know," Gadget nodded. "And that's why she didn't need to see her uncle crying, whining and sobbing! The poor kid could've died from embarrassment. I tell ya, Chief, don't ever go to a funeral after getting over fifty percent of your body replaced by machinery. It really makes you dwell on the negative!"

"Nicholas writes: to my overly emotional sister Becky…" the lawyer read.

"Waaaaah!" Penny's aunt Becky wailed.

"To Becky who grubbed with her husband Hank, grubbed for every cent they could get from us and then cried crocodile tears when we needed sympathy, I leave my old Atari 2600. It's got lots of wires and cords. I hope you and your husband strangle yourselves with them."

"Say what?" Aunt Becky protested, all pretense at grief vanished. "This is an outrage! He just wants to get in the last word!"

"Sylvia writes, to my uncle Abner, who never worked a day in his drunken life, I leave him the wine in the cellar so that he can drink himself to death with it," the lawyer continued.

"Hot dog!" a red nosed old man crowed. "I got what I want!"

The lawyer continued. "Nicholas writes, to my perverted cousin Buck, I leave my secret porn collection that I've got stashed under the bed in the guest room. I don't want my daughter finding any of that smut after I'm gone."

"Have no fear, Nick!" A skinny man in a raincoat assured him. "I'll give it a good home, buddy!"

"Sylvia writes, to Nicholas' sister Becky, I leave my secret collection of romance novels that I've got stashed in the closet near the bathroom. I don't want Penny finding those books either."

"Apparently I didn't know my sister as well as I thought I did," Gadget shrugged.

"Nick and Sylvia write, to our daughter Penny, we leave our house and all properties within that have not been bequeathed to other relatives, including all inventions and patents that are in our name. Sylvia's brother Maxwell Gadget has been named caretaker of said property and legal guardian until Penny Dollar reaches the age of twenty-one. The money in our bank accounts will be in a joint account under the names of both Maxwell Gadget and Penny Dollar. That is all."

Penny's various relatives rose from their seats and grumbled over the tiny amount they had gotten. Most had the decency to console Penny on the way out.

"Inspector?" the lawyer tapped his shoulder. "Your sister wanted you to have this," he handed him a DVD disk. "It's a special message for you and your niece."

"Thank you, Mister Howe," Gadget heard himself saying.

* * *

Gadget, Penny and Brain were a solemn trio when they returned to the Dollar house. "Well that's that," Gadget muttered. "I guess I'll move my stuff in here now. This is a better neighborhood and no sense having you move into my apartment. Gosh I feel so funny. I think I'll stay in the guest room for a while. It seems to strange to move into… your parent's room…"

"I can't believe they're gone," Penny sighed. "What are we going to do now?"

"I know what you mean," Gadget nodded as he sat down on the couch. "I hate to admit it, but Sylvia took care of me my entire life. Even when I was a detective she was the brains. When I took the details of a case over here she could usually solve it from her armchair."

"I… I guess we'll just have to move on," a teary eyed Penny stammered bravely as she and Brain sat on the sofa next to him. "I…I just don't know how I'm going to go on without them…"

Brain whined in sympathy.

"Hey Penny," Gadget said as he pulled a book out of his raincoat. "That gives me an idea! Professor von Slickstein gave me a book on how to cope with loss. It might be able to help us."

"I doubt some book is going to make up for the loss of my parents," Penny grumbled stubbornly.

"Aha!" Gadget smiled as he thumbed through the book. "According to this, you're on Stage One: Denial! The first part of the painful but healing journey through the grieving process!"

"No I'm not!" Penny frowned angrily, "and don't think some stupid book is going to do this for us! I lost my parents and that dumb book isn't going to make it better!"

"Ah," Gadget smiled knowingly. "Now you're in Stage Two: Anger. Go ahead Penny, let it out. It won't hurt my feelings, say whatever comes to mind. You can tell me that I'm a poor stand-in for your parents, it's all right, I can take it."

"All right," Penny sighed in resignation. "Could you put that book down and focus on the real world now? I'll do anything you say if you do…"

"Aha! Stage Three! Bargaining!" Gadget gushed as he turned a page. "Well done, Penny! Most people don't get through the process of grieving so early! Your parents would be proud!"

"M-my parents," Penny whimpered. "Oh I'm never going to see my parents again!" she sobbed.

Before Gadget's worried eyes his niece cried like an eight-year-old schoolgirl. Nothing to worry about, Gadget decided, perfectly normal…because she _is_ an eight-year-old schoolgirl. Penny could act so mature that it was easy to forget that. "Um, i-it's okay, Penny go ahead and let it out," he said. "You've now reached Stage Four: Depression. No need to hold back, it's perfectly normal." He set down the book and hugged her. "Go ahead, Penny. We're back home now. No one can see you. Let it all out. It's doing no good in there anyhow," he cooed as he rocked her back and forth. Brain wrapped his forelegs around the girl for a group hug.

"Th-thanks Uncle Gadget," she wiped her face with her hands and tried to bring her voice back to normal. "I'm all right."

"Only one more stage to go: Acceptance," Gadget declared encouragingly. "As soon as we reach that we'll be able to get back to our old selves." He frowned at that remark. "Our old selves…" That wasn't true was it? He could never go back to his old self. To be honest, there wasn't enough of his old self left to even make the attempt. He was his new self, whether he liked it or not.

"Uncle Gadget?" Penny asked him. "Can you… take those robot arms off?"

Gadget met her gaze all pretense at obliviousness gone. "Not really Penny. These_ are _my arms now. I lost both of my real ones in the explosion."

"Oh Uncle Gadget!" Penny put her hands over her mouth in horror. "How much of you is mechanical?"

"More than I'd like to admit," Gadget sighed. "To be perfectly honest, I'm not sure how much of Maxwell Gadget is left in here. I've got replacement arms and legs, and even my neck is made of metal. It's a good thing I work for Interpol or I'd never be able to ride a plane again."

"Your neck?" Penny repeated, "but Uncle Gadget, you seem fine."

"Go-go Gadget neck," he sighed as he neck telescoped upward three feet. "I didn't want to tell you because I was afraid you'd be afraid of me."

"Y-your head isn't even connected to your body?" asked a disbelieving Penny as Gadget's head returned to his shoulders. "But how is that possible? Your body parts are just connected with metal and electronics?"

"I guess so," he said miserably. "To be honest, I think this happened because your mother talked me into leaving my bodily remains to science. And this is what science did with me."

"D-do," Penny choked. "Do you think like a computer?"

"No, I still think like me," he shrugged. "Wowsers, I must have just been a collection of body parts when I was brought to Professor von Slickstein's lab."

"S-so," Penny gasped. "You didn't fare any better in the explosion than my parents! That's awful!"

"Rikes!" Brain's eyes bulged in horror as realization set in.

"You're telling me," Gadget sighed. "If I hurt myself I'll have to go to a mechanic instead of a doctor."

The three were silent for a while.

"Let's see the DVD Mom and Dad left us," Penny finally suggested.

"Good idea Penny!" Gadget brightened as he walked over to the DVD player. "It doesn't matter if we start crying again, we're feeling miserable anyway! Okay, it's in, let's take a look at it."

He sat back on the couch and turned the television on.

The images of Nick and Sylvia Dollar appeared on the screen.

"Max, Penny, if you're watching this you must be going through one of the worst days in your lives," Sylvia announced melodramatically.

"If you're watching this, we can only assume that something has taken both of us out of the picture," Nick added uncomfortably.

"Maxwell, we've left Penny in your legal custody, and the two of you will share our joint bank account," Sylvia continued.

"You've also got the house until Penny's twenty-one," Nick added. "So wipe your feet before you come inside!" he joked weakly.

Sylvia rolled her eyes. "Penny, your father insisted we make this disk."

"This is the way I want you to remember me, precious," Nick Dollar remarked grimly. "Not as whatever wreck of a man you saw in the hospital. I want you to watch this disk after we're dead and buried. No open casket ceremony!"

"No worries there, Nick," Gadget sighed.

"Now Maxwell, we're placing a lot of trust in you," Sylvia said seriously. "Until Penny grows up, you've got control of everything."

"And when you take away the expense of the labs and the living expenses of two adults that leaves you in control of quite a lot." Nick added.

"That made Nick kind of nervous," Sylvia continued. "In those _Film Noir_ mysteries, a setup like that always gives the stepfather or uncle ideas."

"But then Sylvia reminded me that you don't get ideas!" Nick joked. "Sorry about that, Max. Couldn't help myself."

"The point is, Max that we're trusting you with the world," Sylvia said as she tried to keep a tear out of her eye. "Penny is _our_ world. Please take care of her and be there for her.

"No pressure, we'll just haunt you from beyond the grave if you mess up," Nick added irreverently.

"Don't worry, Sylvia, I'm not going anywhere," Gadget nodded self-confidently. "If that explosion didn't finish me, I don't know what would!"

"And Penny, this is for you," Sylvia Dollar added. "Your Uncle Gadget loves you and he does his best, but he can be accident prone and let's face it: Sometimes he isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer."

"Ooh!" Nicholas Dollar teased. "She got you, Gadget!"

"Penny, I know we asked your uncle to look after you, but I want you to make me a promise. Promise me you'll look after your Uncle Gadget for me. Don't let anything happen to him."

"I will, Mom," a teary eyed Penny Dollar declared. "I swear I won't let anything happen to him!"

"That's my girl," Sylvia nodded sagely from beyond the grave. "Goodbye, and take care of each other. Remember to spend time with each other, because you never know how much time you've got."

"And buckle your seatbelt," Nick added. "Do you hear me, Penny? Buckle your seatbelt. That's probably how we bought it. If it wasn't a car accident, sue the airline for all it's worth! Bye-bye precious. You be a good girl, 'cause your mother and I are always watching over you. Goodbye!

"Goodbye Sweetie!" a teary-eyed Sylvia Dollar gushed as she activated a remote control. The television went blank and nobody spoke for a while.

"Wowsers," Gadget rubbed his eye as he rose to his feet. "I'm going to have to buy some bottled water if we keep crying like this. We're going to dehydrate ourselves at this rate!"

"You got that right, Uncle," Penny chuckled ruefully as she hugged her dog. Brain licked her face as a comforting gesture. "My eyes hurt from all this crying."

At that moment, the sound of a telephone ringing could be heard. "I'll get the phone. That's probably some of our relatives calling with their condolences," Gadget said offhandedly as he strode to a telephone and picked up the receiver. "Hello? Anyone there? That's funny, I'm getting a dial tone."

"And I can still hear a phone ringing," Penny added. "The noise seems to travel with you. Could it be your cell phone?"

"It couldn't be Penny," Gadget shook his head. "My cell phone sounds a lot more irritating than this." He scratched his ear in puzzlement. "Wait a minute! It's getting louder all of a sudden!" He spun around, searching for the sound of the ringing noise. "That noise keeps getting louder and quieter!" Gadget declared. "It must be moving!"

"It sure is!" Penny acknowledged as she rose from the couch to walk over and take Gadget's hand. "It's coming from your hand."

"Of course it is," Gadget rolled his eyes. "There's so much other stuff in there." Gadget's gloved fingertips seemed to be caps that he could open to expose different tools, including a flashlight, a screwdriver, and a drill bit. His thumb didn't open up, instead he pulled a small antenna out of it. "Ah!" his eyes brightened up. There's a little speaker in my thumb, I must talk into my pinkie!"

He put his hand in a strange gesture, with his thumb at his ear and his pinkie below his mouth. "Hello? Who is this? I think I should tell you I have an unlisted hand… What?" He paused to listen. "Chief? You didn't tell me I had a phone in my hand…" he paused again and nodded. "You're where? Right away, Chief, I should take out the garbage anyway. It's been unattended for days!"

He pushed the little antenna back into his thumb and looked down at Penny and Brain. "I'm going to take out the garbage, now Penny," he told her. "Nobody has been here in the last few days and it must be getting pretty nasty. Go-go Gadget noseclip!" His hat opened and the mechanical arm emerged. In the yellow gloved hand was an old-style clothespin. "Well what do you know," he said as the clothespin sealed off his nose. "I've got a Gadget noseclip!" He walked into the kitchen and pulled a smelly paper garbage bag out from under the sink.

"We better follow him Brain," Penny whispered to her dog. "That was Chief Quimby. It must have something to do with what happened to Mom and Dad."

"Ruff," Brain nodded as he followed her out of the room.

Next: _The Road to Nowhere_


	6. The Road to Nowhere

**Inspector Gadget: The Pilot**

_Inspector Gadget and all related characters and setting are owned by __**Cookie Jar Entertainment**__. DiC now remains an in-credit name only. _

_Chapter Six: __The Road to Nowhere_

Outside Gadget glanced left and right before whispering. "Chief? Where are you?" He opened the trash can and placed the paper bag filled with garbage inside. "Chief? I can't stand around here all day; the neighbors might get suspicious…"

"I'm in _here_, Gadget," Chief Quimby growled from inside the trashcan.

"Why Chief!" Gadget exclaimed as he picked up the bag of refuse to see his superior hiding in the garbage can. "What are you doing in there?"

"I don't want to place your niece in danger," Quimby hissed. "From now on, if I have to contact you for assignment when she's around I'll be hiding or in disguise. That way to casual passersby you'll look like an ordinary man out with his niece, and not a secret agent of Interpol."

"That's brilliant, Chief!" Gadget cheered. "What's my assignment?"

"Read this," Quimby handed him a sheet of paper.

As Gadget read the paper aloud, the sound of an electric typewriter emanated from his somewhere inside his skull. "'Suspected MAD bomber Louis Stiletto caught on film leaving local Burger Queen after the fastfood restaurant was damaged by an explosion. It is believed that MAD wishes to silence the witness to the Dollar Labs bombing. Take Penny Dollar, the sole witness to the bombing at Dollar Labs, to a designated safehouse in the country and protect her at all costs. This message will self-destruct.' Holy cow, Chief! Penny Dollar is my niece!"

"I know Gadget," Chief Quimby nodded grimly. "The cameras at the Burger Queen spotted your car there less than a minute before the explosion. We think the bomb was intended for you, or more likely, Penny. She's the only one who actually saw Louis Stiletto throw a bomb into the building. Now it's not just personal, we've got to make sure she lives to testify!"

"Where's Stiletto now, Chief?" Gadget asked with a look of determination in his eye.

"We've got men combing the city for him now, but we don't want to put out an all-points-bulletin or he'll run," Quimby said. "Stiletto has managed to slip through our fingers in the past, but if your niece can identify him, we've got him! Congratulations, Gadget. I was being sarcastic earlier, but as of now you're back on active duty. Your first assignment is to protect your niece. Make sure nothing happens to her. We've got a cabin up in the mountains that you can use until we catch him. Pose as a man and his daughter on vacation and try not to attract attention. Can you do that?"

"Don't worry, Chief," Gadget assured him. "Nothing is going to happen to Penny while I'm on the job!"

"See that it doesn't," Quimby nodded. "That little girl needs you more than ever. Normally I'd assign someone else, but she trusts you. This will be your toughest assignment ever, Gadget. You're going to have to become her entire world while protecting her from assassins from MAD. You could be facing another bomb threat, an assassin's bullet, or a killer's knife. You'll be in constant danger."

"And… loving it!" Gadget declared as he crumbled the paper and threw it in the trash can with his superior. He placed the sack of garbage on top of him and closed the lid before he walked away.

"Gadget?" the Chief's muffled voice called from the garbage can. "Did you forget that the message will self-destruct? Gadg—" An explosion blew the lid off the trash can. "Yep," said the smoking and singed form of Chief Quimby as he emerged from the misshapen trash can. "He forgot."

"Gosh Brain, we're in big trouble!" Penny said from the corner of the house where she and her dog had been hiding.

"Ruff!" Brain agreed.

"It won't take them long to figure out where we live!" she announced. "We better pack an overnight bag!"

"Rright!" her dog saluted.

Penny and Brain reentered the house to discover her Uncle Gadget in her room going through her drawers. "What are you doing, Uncle Gadget?" Penny asked as he put some of her clothing in an open suitcase he had on her bed.

"Just packing for a little trip," Gadget replied. "It's so soon after your parent's deaths that I don't want living at this house with me to be associated with the way you must be feeling right now. I want living with your Uncle Gadget to be a positive experience. Let's take a trip and have some fun before we come back and try to establish a routine…" his voice trailed off when he saw the serious look on her face. "I'm not trying to disrespect your parents, Penny. I just want to make a good impression," he said apologetically. "If life with your Uncle Gadget starts out painfully, it might stay that way. I'd rather it was fun, what do you say?"

Penny and Brain knew the real reason Uncle Gadget was taking her out of town, but didn't say anything. Uncle Gadget didn't want the people that tried to kill them to find them. It was actually good thinking. If her parents weren't safe at work then they weren't safe at home, were they? The thugs at Uncle Gadget's apartment proved that beyond the shadow of a doubt!

Penny nodded nervously. "Sure thing, Uncle Gadget! I'll pack what I need here. You go ahead and pack your stuff again, all right?"

* * *

Soon their bags were packed and they were back in Inspector Gadget's Volkswagen. Their first stop was Metro City Police First Precinct Headquarters. "If it's not too much trouble, I'd like to check in with Chief Quimby before we head out," Gadget told his niece. "Sorry if I'm being single-minded but I want to know how the Dollar case is going," he joked grimly.

"That's okay, Uncle Gadget," Penny nodded as she shared the black humor. "I want to know how the investigation is going too."

They shared some nervous laughter before sobering. "Come on, Brain, you too," Gadget decided as he opened the back door so the dog could go with them.

Metro City Police Headquarters looked pretty much like any other police headquarters, at least in the front. Gadget was greeted by some fellow coworkers who expressed their congratulations on his speedy recovery as well as their commiserations on his loss. Penny's presence got hushed whispers as the brave men and women of the Metro City Police Department realized that this was the girl who had lost both her parents. The police psychiatrist took one look at Penny and ran the other way, causing the eight-year-old schoolgirl to blush.

In the back of the building was an elevator next to a telephone booth. Penny wasn't used to seeing archaic phone booths in this of era cell phones, let alone indoors, but she supposed that a public phone was only natural for a place where everyone demanded their one phone call.

"Can you keep a secret?" Gadget asked seriously. Well, seriously for Uncle Gadget at least.

"I sure can!" his niece assured him, thinking of his bionic parts.

"Good," Gadget nodded. "You and Brain squeeze into the phone booth with me."

"All right, Uncle Gadget," Penny nodded as she and her dog struggled to find room in the cramped booth. Did he want her to talk to somebody?

Inspector Gadget closed the door and dialed a number on the telephone. Then the bottom of the phone booth sank into the floor. The telephone booth was really an elevator! A particular number must activate the secret elevator that lowered the trio into a large basement chamber.

Chief Quimby walked over to them. "Gadget," he nodded. "There you are. Professor Gizmo is finished testing the devices on your car. In addition, I'd like you to wear the Inflato-coat."

"Aw Chief," Gadget moaned. "That last time I wore that I got stuck in an elevator! And the time before that I flew around like a balloon! I almost broke my neck!"

"It also makes a handy airbag in case the ones in the Gadgetmobile don't work," Quimby pointed out. "Just in case any… oh… Penny. Hello there."

"Hello Chief Quimby," Penny nodded. She knew that Quimby didn't want to talk about the MAD bomber that was looking for her as long as she was in the room. "I'd like to see the new car, if it's not too much trouble," she said shyly.

"Sure thing, Penny," Quimby nodded, grateful for a chance to talk to Gadget alone, if only for a second. "I want to make sure that child is extra safe!" he whispered in Gadget's ear. "Neither you or the DA can afford to lose her, got it?"

"Got it, Chief," Gadget nodded. "I'll take the coat, no questions asked. As a matter of fact I'll never take it off!"

"Good," Quimby nodded. "Now let me show you the car." He walked over to where Penny and Brain were studying a four seat sports car painted in a police style black-and-white. The word 'POLICE' was stenciled in just behind the door on each side. Quimby and Gadget entered the car, Gadget on the driver's side, Quimby on the passenger side. Penny and Brain got in the back seat. "These switches control the oil slick, smokescreen, and forward firing weaponry. This toggle switch controls the glue missiles that launch out of the back…"

"What does this do Chief?" Gadget asked as he clicked a second toggle switch.

"Ah!" Quimby cried as the roof opened and he shot out of the vehicle. He bounced off the floor of the large underground chamber and rolled to avoid further injury. He then got up and limped back to the car and leaned through the window. "That activates the passenger ejector seat," he muttered in resignation.

"Sorry about that, Chief," Gadget blushed. "So, uh… where is the safe house, Chief? I uh… I mean…" He glanced in the back seat where Penny and Brain were seated. "Where is the cabin in the country where I'll be taking Penny for a few days until you catch the bomber—uh, I mean until we get over this terrible tragedy…"

"It's okay, Uncle Gadget," Penny assured him. "I understand that until the MAD bomber is caught we have to be careful."

"Good girl," Gadget nodded, "but don't worry. It's unlikely that the MAD bomber knows you can identify him and even if he did he doesn't know where you are."

* * *

At that moment in the parking lot, Stiletto got out of Gadget's Volkswagen. "Everything is set, Doctor Claw," he said into his cell phone. "As soon as Gadget turns on the ignition he and his niece will be blown sky high!"

"Excellent," Doctor Claw's purred from his secret headquarters. "Did you hear that, Madcat? Inspector Gadget is going on a _one… way… trip_…" he chortled as he pet his snickering cat.

* * *

Back in Interpol's top secret Metro City headquarters, Gadget studied the coordinates on the Gadgetmobile's Global Positioning System. "One question, Chief. How is a sports car like this going to handle those mountain roads? No offense but I don't think it will make it!"

"Ah," Quimby nodded from the passenger seat. "Allow me. Sit up straight in your seat Penny," he said over his shoulder as he activated the gearshift. With servos whirring and metal clicking, the flat and lean Gadgetmobile transformed into a squat and box shaped minivan. It had four doors and the back of the cab was painted red with a black capital 'G' against a circular yellow background. "In its van configuration it's got four wheel drive. It also is the perfect 'civilian' vehicle compared to the 'pursuit' mode. Nobody should suspect that this is one of the most advanced spy cars on the road today."

"That's great, Chief!" Gadget smiled. "I'll take this out to the parking lot and transfer our luggage out of the bug! Let's go!" As he started the car, his sleeve caught on the ejector seat toggle switch. Once again Quimby was launched out the vehicle to roll painfully on the floor. "Sorry about that, Chief," Gadget shrugged. When the Chief rose to his feet red-faced and fixed Gadget with a murderous look, the bionic detective added: "Well, got to run; see you later, Chief!" and gunned the engine. Before Quimby could tear Gadget limb from limb the Gadgetmobile left the underground chamber and went up a ramp until it reached the street.

A secret door opened in the side of a building and the car exited into an alley before turning to return to the parking lot in front of police headquarters.

"Well, here we are," Gadget said as he stopped the red and white van in back of his yellow Volkswagen. "As soon as we transfer our luggage to the Gadgetvan, we'll be on our way." After he got out of the van, he opened the trunks of both vehicles. "Go-go Gadgetarms." His bionic arms telescoped out and managed to transfer the luggage in less than two seconds. Then he shut the trunks, got in the van and drove to the end of the parking lot.

Stiletto ran up to the Volkswagen and watched helplessly as his quarry drove away. He shuddered as his cell phone rang. He answered it.

"Report," Doctor Claw's deep voice rumbled.

"He switched cars on us!" Stiletto reported. "He's in some kind of minivan and he's leaving the parking lot!"

"After him!" Claw ordered. "Whatever you do, don't lose him! If you can't find him, no one will find _you_!"

"Yes Doctor Claw!" Stiletto acknowledged as he hit the side of his head with his fist. Without thinking, he got into the driver's seat of Gadget's Volkswagen and hotwired the ignition…

A deafening explosion thundered through the parking lot.

"What was _that_?" asked a frightened Penny.

"I don't know," Gadget extended his neck and looked behind him. Strange goggles lowered from the brim of his hat to conceal his eyes. Since he was looking behind him, Gadget didn't see his battered yellow Volkswagen land in the parking lot across the street _in front _of him. Perhaps 'land' was not entirely accurate. It kind of bounced before rolling a stop, the sound of broken metal and glass accompanying its every movement. "Can't see anything," Gadget muttered. "Perhaps the bomb squad is testing one of those new bomb disposal robots."

"I hope so," shivered Penny, who was looking in the same direction of her uncle and had missed the yellow Volkswagen's flight through the sky. "I've heard enough explosions to last a lifetime!"

"Well let's go," Gadget said as his head returned to its place between his shoulders. "It's time we went someplace where there's peace and quiet."

As the Gadgetvan drove off, a bruised, singed and smoking Stiletto staggered out of Gadget's _ex_-Volkswagen. He was grateful that Gadget had installed armor plating under the driver's seat and roll bars in the cab, for that was the reason the little murderer was still alive. But he still hadn't finished Gadget…

"So… we're going on a trip huh?" Penny teased as they drove down the street.

"That's right, Penny," Gadget nodded. "A little trip up to the mountains is just what we need after this terrible tragedy. Between you and me, I'd like to get used to all the gadgets in my body away from prying eyes."

"It doesn't have anything to do with the fact that I'm the only one who can identify the MAD bomber does it?" the blonde child asked.

"Of course not, Penny," Gadget squirmed uncomfortably. "Why do you say that?"

"This Gadgetmobile seems awfully well armed for going on vacation," the precocious Penny replied.

"I'm sorry, Penny," Gadget sighed. "Chief Quimby thinks that MAD might be trying to silence the only witness to the bombing at your parent's laboratories. He's probably just being careful but why take the chance? He's assigned me bodyguard duty. Why not? I'm your legal guardian anyway, it just gives me a chance to reconnect with my niece without using up anymore of my sick days," he winked.

"Why aren't you hunting the MAD bomber, Uncle Gadget?" Penny asked. "In the movies, the hero always goes after the bad guys regardless of orders."

"In the movies the hero doesn't have a family to worry about," Gadget smirked. "Sure, Penny I understand. I'm angry at the MAD bomber too. I can't tell you how tempting it would be to become a totally obsessed vigilante and use my new gadgets to work my way through Doctor Claw's organization until I either get my man or die in a hail of gunfire. But that won't bring Sylvia and Nick back. I've got to think about you. You're more important than any crazy plans for vengeance, regardless of what they did to us."

"I… I hope I'm not getting in your way," Penny sighed.

"Get in my way?" Gadget repeated in disbelief. "Where'd you get a crazy idea like that? You're the only thing keeping me sane!" His hat opened and a coo-coo clock appeared to chime twice. "Let's face it; you're the one that proves that I'm still a human being and not some mechanical freak that's been programmed to think he's a police inspector! You're not getting in my way, Penny. You're an essential part of my entire operation! Don't you ever forget it!"

"I'm an essential part of your entire operation," nodded an impressed Penny. "I won't forget, Uncle Gadget."

"Sorry about lying to you earlier," Gadget continued. "I'm only trying to protect you. Sometimes grownups have to lie to protect the ones they love. Sometimes they have to lie _to_ the ones they love, because the truth would only hurt. You've been through enough. Let's just go have a good time until they catch this guy so your testimony can put him away."

"Sometimes you have to lie to the ones you love to protect them," Penny nodded. "I'll remember that always, Uncle Gadget!"

"Swell, now I'll never be able to pull one on you," Gadget rolled his eyes before bursting into laughter. Penny and Brain joined him as the van went down the road.

_Next: A Quiet Time in the Country _


	7. A Quiet Time in the Country

**Inspector Gadget: The Pilot**

_Inspector Gadget and all related characters and setting are owned by __**Cookie Jar Entertainment**__. DiC now remains an in-credit name only. Snoopy and Peanuts are owned by Peanuts Worldwide. _

_Chapter Seven: A Quiet Time in the Country_

"Now remember Penny," Gadget said as he pulled the Gadgetvan into a gas station. "As far as anyone knows, we are just a man and his daughter taking a fishing trip to the mountains." He got out of the van and pulled the tip of his finger off to reveal a nozzle. "That last thing we want to do is be conspicuous. Go-go Gadget water pistol." Water squirted out of his index finger to douse the windshield. "Remember, the last thing we want to do is attract attention," he said as a hand emerged from his hat holding a squeegee. "Let's see," he said as he leaned over to let the hand extending from his hat clean the windshield. "We should probably go by different names. My name will be 'Adams' and your name will be 'Sophie'."

"Good idea," Penny said sarcastically as her Uncle used his telescoping arms to get the gas nozzle and fill the tank, "because we wouldn't want to _attract attention_."

"We certainly wouldn't," Gadget agreed as the hand with the squeegee disappeared into his hat. "Until Louis Stiletto is found, the last thing we want to do is go around blabbing that we're going to the safe house by the lake off the Old Creek Road five miles off the highway and in that cabin is the only witness who can identify the man who destroyed Dollar Labs!" he announced imperiously. He got back in the van and started the engine. "So remember, Penny. Loose lips sink ships!"

Penny covered her eyes in embarrassment as the van drove off. After they were gone the gas station attendant adjusted his ball cap that had the stylized cat face that was the MAD logo. "Doctor Claw will want to hear about this," he muttered.

* * *

Finally the Gadgetvan drove up to a quaint cabin in the mountains by a lake. The setting was quite picturesque with the forest covering the uneven terrain. It was a wonderful place for a vacation, Penny decided. Her Dad loved to take the dogs he was breeding to places like this…

The little girl blinked back the tears as she exited the van. She couldn't let every wonderful thing she encountered make her think of her parents. Then she would be no good to herself, Brain, _or_ Uncle Gadget.

"Ah just smell that mountain air," Gadget stretched, causing his arms to telescope out to over ten feet. "It will be good to get away for a while eh, Penny? Nothing like getting back to nature when you're completely unnatural."

"You said it Uncle Gadget," Penny smiled bravely. "Let's unpack the van and get settled in!"

"That's my girl," Gadget nodded. "After that I'll go for a walk. It will give me a chance to test my new legs on uneven terrain." And get the lay of the land, Gadget thought to himself. It had been over a year since Interpol hid a witness up here and Gadget wanted to reacquaint himself with the area.

* * *

Somewhat tired from the trip, Penny decided to unpack and take a look at her parent's notes. Most of it was beyond her, but she was clever enough to get the gist. Reading her father's notes was a real eye opener! She couldn't believe some of the things Brain was capable of. "Brain, get in here! You won't believe what I found out about you!"

"Woof?" Brain appeared in the doorway.

"Brain! Get this!" said the unbelieving girl as she held her father's notes. "It says here that you're partially telepathic to help you communicate with humans! Isn't that amazing?"

The dog stood up on all fours to snort derisively and make a shooing gesture with his forepaw.

"I know, I can't believe it either," Penny smiled. "Dad says that your cranial structure has lobes that you don't use much and that he developed them to create the ultimate seeing-eye dog," Penny continued as her teal eyes scanned the page. "Now get this: Dad says that he increased the power of one of your temporal lobes in order to get guide dogs into places that don't allow animals. This is _really_ weird!"

"Whu?" Brain's eyes squinted in disbelief over her shoulder.

"I know!" Penny nodded. "He said that by using the power of suggestion, you could disguise yourself a person and everybody would think you were a human being!"

Brain made a chuckling sound as he shook his head.

"I know," Penny agreed. "Sounds pretty silly to me too. 'The power of suggestion'? You're a dog, not a hypnotist! Hey, do you want to dress up as a person and see if it works?"

"Woof?" The dog was hesitant. This looked like another excuse to put him in a doggie sweater.

"You know, give it a try," Penny smiled. "Let's dress you up and see if you can pass for a human. If this works just think of all the places you'll be able to go!"

Brain growled and whined, but eventually gave in. Anything to get Penny's mind off the loss of her parents. The dog left the room and returned wearing a fur coat and a red hunter's hat. Boots poked out from under the coat to complete the illusion. "Ruff?" the dog asked.

Penny giggled. "Oh Brain! You're so cute!" the child gushed. "We've got to get a picture of this!"

"Runh-uh," Brain shook his head indignantly.

"Hello Penny, I'm back," Inspector Gadget said as he walked in the door. "There might be enough daylight for a barbeque before the day ends and… Wowsers! Who's that?"

"Who's who?" Penny asked as she and Brain looked around the cabin, but there was no one but the three of them.

"I don't believe it!" Gadget gasped. "Penny get down!" he ordered as he tackled the hapless Brain. "All right, punk! Who sent you? Was it Doctor Claw? Thought you could silence a little girl, huh? You're lucky she's in the room or you wouldn't make it to trial…"

Brain barked in protest as Gadget shoved him against the wall.

"Trying to pull the old 'I don't speak English' routine, huh?" Gadget said as he patted the dog down in his search for concealed weapons. "I'll bet you can speak English just fine when Doctor Claw is talking to you! When the jury gets a look at your ugly mug they'll put you away for so long that when you get out we'll be using spaceships instead of cars! Now get on the floor and put your hands behind your back! You've got the right to remain silent…"

"Uncle Gadget!" Penny cried. "What are you doing?"

"I don't know what story this guy told you to get you to let him in Penny," Gadget shook his head, "but don't be fooled. This man's a MAD agent! You only need to look at him to see his low criminal forehead…"

"Uncle Gadget, that's Brain!" Penny insisted.

"Doctor Claw is the brains of his organization," Gadget nodded as he placed a set of handcuffs on Brain's 'wrists'. "But now that you mention it, where _is_ Brain, anyway? Did you put him outside because he was barking too much?"

"No, Uncle Gadget, that's Brain!" Penny repeated. "Our dog, Brain! You've arrested Brain!"

"Wha?" Gadget squinted at the little perpetrator. Now that Penny mentioned it, the intruder _did_ have a long snout. But he couldn't _really_ be the family dog, could he?

When Gadget was a boy, the newspaper ran a comic strip called _Dick Tracy_. A _Film Noir_ era comic strip, the title character was a police detective who always wore a hat and a raincoat, just as Inspector Gadget did now. The villains were usually a collection of physically deformed criminals, some of them more appropriate for a freak show than for organized crime. When the newspaper pulled the comic strip Dick Tracy was tracking a crook known as 'Dogface', a hoodlum that resembled a dog. Since then, subconsciously, Gadget had always assumed that's what a criminal is supposed to look like.

Penny removed the dog's hat and pulled off his boots. Gadget took the cuffs of the dog and pulled him to his feet before pulling the coat off him to reveal a golden Labrador retriever standing upright like Snoopy from _Peanuts_. "See?" the little girl assured him. "It's only Brain. It's our dog, Brain."

"Reah," the dog nodded warily. "Rain."

"Uh…" Gadget rubbed his startled eyes. "It must really be dark in here or something." He shook his head in disbelief. "My eyes must be tired from all that driving," he finally decided. He walked away and attempted to check his pulse before he remembered that his wrists were made of metal. He tried his neck before he remembered that it was metal too. "Go-go gadget stethoscope," he muttered. Maybe his heart was where it was supposed to be, but by now he was expecting a robot ticker.

"Wow Brain, it worked!" Penny gasped. "You actually made Uncle Gadget think you were a stranger! But why wasn't I affected?"

"_Rue_ new," the dog pointed out.

"That's right, I was _expecting_ you to walk in wearing clothes," Penny nodded before she scratched her head. "I guess the suggestion doesn't work if you're expecting it. It must work by making people see what they expect to see. People won't be fooled by your disguise if they already know it's you."

"Ress so," Brain shrugged before returning to all fours. Nicholas Dollar may have modified his skeleton so he could comfortably walk on two legs but right now it seemed like a good idea to be as normal as possible. Telepathy, hypnosis… MAD bombers and men with guns... The whole thing made a dog yearn for the simple days of playing fetch and burying bones.

* * *

In the meantime, Hunk, Rocky and Stiletto were surveying the area from across the lake with binoculars. "Are you sure he's in there?" Stiletto growled.

"A guy in a gray hat and trenchcoat entered that cabin a few minutes ago," Rocky replied while looking through his binoculars. "That's what Gadget was wearing the last time we saw him."

"It's hard to see, but I think that's the van you told us about," Hunk added as he peered through another set of binoculars. "It's hard to see with that tree in the way. Take a look is that it?"

Stiletto focused his binoculars and finally broke into a wide grin. "That's it all right! Red on top and everything! This is perfect; they're miles away from everywhere. Here's what we'll do…"

* * *

Oblivious to the impending danger, Inspector Gadget went outside the cabin to start the barbecue. "Okay, let's see if any of these gadgets can be useful," he muttered as he turned on the gas. He uncapped his pointer finger and said "Go-go Gadget-laser." A bolt of energy zapped out of his finger and knocked the barbecue over. "Whoops."

When Gadget bent over to right it, a window on the cabin broke inexplicably. Not knowing where the sound of breaking glass came from, he examined the barbeque for damage and was delighted to discover that not only was the barbeque not damaged, but it had successfully lit.

Satisfied, Gadget turned and walked back into the cabin. As he shut the door, a hole appeared in the sturdy door and a spiderweb pattern of cracks appeared around the hole. Gadget apparently thought the cracking of wood noise was caused by the shutting of the door, because he soon appeared outside with three raw hamburger patties on a plate and a metal kitchen spatula.

He whistled as the hamburgers cooked and after a minute or two turned the hamburgers with the spatula… at least he did before the spatula broke apart and a small hole appeared on the wall of the cabin behind him. "Eh?" Gadget glanced at the broken handle before tossing it over his shoulders and muttering: "Go-go Gadget-spatula." He turned the final burger and walked back to the door as he called out. "Penny! The burgers are almost done! Do you have the buns ready?"

"Almost Uncle Gadget," Penny nodded, "but something funny is going on! What happened to the window? And why is there a hole in the door?"

"A bird must have hit the window," Gadget supposed. "Speaking of birds, maybe a woodpecker made that hole in the door."

"Since we've been here?" Penny asked doubtfully. "That hole wasn't in the door when we got here!"

"What's got into Brain?" Gadget asked as he noticed the family dog cowering under the table.

"He must have heard something," Penny guessed.

Gadget passed by an unbroken window and the tinkling of glass was heard as a hole with a spiderweb pattern of cracks appeared suddenly. Brain whimpered and curled into a fetal position.

"Uncle Gadget!" Penny cried. "I think that someone is shooting at us!"

"Don't be ridiculous Penny," Gadget shook his head. "I didn't hear a shot. A bird must have hit the window when we weren't looking."

"Uncle Gadget, get down!" Penny said as she flattened herself on the carpet.

"Penny get up, you'll get your hands dirty down there and we haven't finished… the BURGERS!" Gadget dashed out of the cabin and quickly scooped the hamburgers off the barbeque before they could burn. He then turned and hurried into the cabin before the meat got cold.

A trail of holes appeared in the wall of the cabin as if following him.

The door opened and Gadget stood in the doorway was his arm extended out of his sleeve. "Silly me, I didn't shut off the gas." When he shut the door, two more holes appeared in the door.

* * *

On the other side of the lake, Stiletto threw his hat on the ground in frustration.

"For crying out loud, Rocky, I though you said you were a sniper!"

The taller slender hoodlum looked up from the scope on the highpowered suppressed rifle that was mounted on the tripod before him. "_You_ try to hit a target over a thousand yards away with trees and bushes in the way!" he hissed back. "It's not easy!"

"Maybe we need to get closer!" The large and burly Hunk suggested as he lowered his binoculars.

The three assassins paled. None of them wanted to get within arm's reach of Inspector Gadget. Not only that but they didn't know what Gadget's arm's reach _was_.

* * *

After a rather tense meal, Penny waited until it was almost dark before she went outside to investigate. Using a knife she found in the kitchen she picked a piece of metal out of the thick log façade that formed the exterior walls of the cabin. "I was right, Brain!" the little girl exclaimed to her incredulous dog. "This is a bullet! Someone _was_ shooting at us! I bet they were after Uncle Gadget! _He's_ our protection detail!"

"Bow wow ruff!" Brain nodded warily.

"This means that the woods could be crawling with MAD agents!" the child decided. "It's not safe here! They could be waiting for us on the road out of here, so I'm going to call Chief Quimby!" She activated the communications device on her wristwatch. "Calling Chief Quimby! The MAD agents know where we are! I'm requesting a police escort to take us out of here, right away!" She looked up at her dog. "Well that's that, Brain. I hope that Chief Quimby checks his messages!"

"Penny?" Inspector Gadget's voice was heard as he opened the door. "What are you doing out here?" His coat was open but as he stood in the doorway he pulled it closed. Unfortunately when he pulled on the top button it pulled out, revealing it to be on a sturdy retractable string. "Wowsers! Not again!" the inspector cried as his coat inflated with air and expanded so much that he was stuck in the doorway!

"Uncle?" Penny asked incredulously. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, Penny," he assured her. "Can you reach that button I just pulled? It will deflate the inflato-coat." His trenchcoat and expanded so much that he couldn't bend his arms to reach the buttons in front. "I guess, from now on, I should call it the Gadget-coat. Thanks to my stainless steel reinforced backbone, I'm probably the only one on the force who can wear this silly thing safely."

Penny pulled on the button that her uncle had, and it came out on a string like the ring on the backs of old-style talking dolls. Air escaped as the grey trenchcoat returned to normal. "Are you okay, Uncle Gadget?"

"Fine, Penny, but what's bothering Brain?" Inspector Gadget pointed at the orange dog who was looking into the woods and growling. "You smell something boy? What is it?"

"Uncle Gadget, I think there are MAD agents in these woods," Penny told him.

"Nonsense, Penny. Nobody knows where we are," Gadget smiled, completely unaware that he was in the crosshairs of a sniper's scope at that very moment.

_Next: Gun Safety_


	8. Gun Safety

**Inspector Gadget: The Pilot**

_Inspector Gadget and all related characters and setting are owned by __**Cookie Jar Entertainment**__. DiC now remains an in-credit name only. _

_Chapter Eight: Gun Safety _

"Uncle Gadget, I just pulled a bullet out of the wall!" Penny exclaimed as she showed him the spent projectile.

"Hm," Gadget took the bullet and examined it with the aid of a magnifying glass held by a mechanical hand that extended out from the crown of his hat. "Are you sure that this wasn't left by some careless hunter last season?"

"Uncle Gadget, those holes weren't in the wall when we got here," Penny put her hands on her hips and frowned. "I've called Chief Quimby and asked for a police escort. We've got to get out of here!"

"Personally I think that you're being an alarmist, but I'm going to look around just in case," Gadget decided. "Pull the curtains, and then stay away from the windows. I'll let you know when I get back." With that, the bionic inspector turned and left the cabin.

"You better follow him Brain," Penny decided. "I think that he may need help!"

* * *

Nearby, Stiletto, Rocky and Hunk emerged from the forest to study the cabin. "Are you sure that's it?" the short and bald Stiletto asked the taller and slimmer Rocky.

"Positive," Rocky nodded as he pointed at the disguised Gadgetmobile. "See? Even when it's this dark you can still see his van!"

"Okay, here's what we'll do; we'll wait until he's asleep and then…" Stiletto was interrupted by a familiar voice.

"Excuse me!" Inspector Gadget said as he walked right up to them. "Are you guys my backup?"

"B-b-backup?" a shaking Rocky asked as Stiletto and Hunk turned away and drew their collars up to hide their faces.

"Yes," Gadget nodded. "Penny told me that she called Chief Quimby for a police escort to take us out of here. That's you guys, right?"

"Yuh-yuh-yes!" Rocky stammered and nodded. "That's us! We're your backup! Any problems so far?"

"My niece thinks that someone has been shooting at us," Gadget cupped his hand and spoke in a conspiratory whisper. "She's only eight and probably seeing things, but with my niece I just can't take the chance, you know what I'm saying?" When Rocky nodded, Gadget continued. "Follow me inside, and I'll pack up and fill you in. My niece pulled a bullet out of the wall that I think you should look at… Hold it! Don't turn around! Look over your shoulder slowly… Do you see that little guy?"

Rocky looked behind him. Hiding behind some bushes was a little man in a hunter's hat and a fur coat. The strange little man had a long snout that reminded Rocky of a dog.

"Is he with you?" Gadget asked.

Rocky shook his head. "Nope."

"Looks like Penny was right," Gadget nodded grimly. "We _are_ being watched after all. Okay let's get inside! Try not to act to suspicious and he won't realize he's been spotted. If we're in luck he's alone. Come on."

Before Brain's disbelieving eyes, Gadget was leading the three MAD agents into the cabin! Quickly, the dog shed his disguise so he could run on all fours. He cut around the back and jumped through a window so he could warn Penny.

"Brain!" Penny gasped. "You scared me! Why aren't you watching Uncle Gadget?"

"Bow wow!" Brain gestured wildly. "Ruff ruff!"

"Slow down, Brain, I can't understand you!" Penny implored him. "What's wrong? Are we in trouble?"

"Penny!" Gadget's voice called as he and the three MAD agents entered through the front door. "Pack your things, the cavalry's arrived! I must say that those hunter disguises you're wearing are really convincing! But it's the high-powered rifle that really sells it."

"What?" Penny looked at the frantically gesturing Brain. "We're surrounded by MAD agents? We've got to do something!" Penny looked into the cabin's main room to see her Uncle standing in front of the three assassins who tried to kill him back at his apartment. They were smiling and pointing pistols at his back. "Oh no!"

Heedless of her own safety, she dashed into the front room and pulled the top button on Inspector Gadget's coat. She quickly retreated back into the kitchen when Gadget's coat expanded so much it filled up the whole room. Stiletto, Hunk, and Rocky gasped for breath as the rubbery grey blob pushed them against the walls. Their arms were pinned to the wall so they couldn't even free themselves with their guns.

"Penny, why did you do that for?" an irritated Gadget asked her. "Are you crazy? We spotted a MAD agent skulking around outside!"

"He's not _outside_, you let him _inside_, Uncle Gadget!" Penny corrected. "When you came in you let in the three guys who tried to kill us!"

"But Penny, they're our backup…" Gadget began before he frowned in thought. "For crying out loud! I don't believe it! Don't tell me that the MAD agents snuck in here posing as our backup!"

"The MAD agents snuck in here by posing as our backup, Uncle Gadget," Penny informed him.

"I _asked_ you not to tell me that!" growled an irritated inspector. He sighed in humiliation. "Are you sure? You could just be paranoid, you know…"

"Uncle Gadget, the one trapped behind your left armpit is Louis Stiletto," Penny insisted. "I'd recognize that face anywhere!"

"Okay, I'll see for myself," Gadget said as his now chubby hand reached for the activating button on his trenchcoat. Brain pulled the string and the trenchcoat deflated, freeing the MAD agents. Gadget turned and faced them. "Is it true?" he asked the sinister trio. "Are you really MAD agents?"

"Yeah it's true," Stiletto growled. "What's the matter with you? You'd have to be blind as a bat to not recognize us!"

Gadget's eyes bulged in realization. "Well, uh… It was dark out there!" he insisted childishly. "I couldn't see! In the meantime, put your hands up! You're under arrest!" Gadget reached into his coat pocket to pull out… nothing!

"Looking for this?" Rocky smiled as he held up Gadget's archaic .38 police special. "Not only am I a good sniper, I'm also a decent pickpocket."

"Put 'em up, Gadget!" Stiletto grinned as he and his fellows pointed their pistols at him. "We've got you covered."

"So you think you've got the drop on me, eh?" Gadget asked smugly. "Well I've got news for you guys! My niece has already called Chief Quimby. At this very moment, this cabin is being surrounded by over fifty policemen armed with rifles and accompanied by the most vicious police dogs on the force! Would you believe it? Fifty Policemen!"

"I find that hard to believe," Rocky shook his head skeptically. "You thought _we_ were your backup."

"How about _twenty _policemen with attack dogs?" Gadget tried weakly.

"Duh… I don't think so," said the tall and burly Hunk.

"_Ten_ policemen?" Gadget offered. "Eight? Five? How about a boy scout and a really sick poodle?"

"Put your hands _up_, Gadget!" Stiletto growled. "We've got you, and you're completely unarmed!"

"Not _completely_ unarmed gentlemen," Gadget smiled coyly. "As a matter of fact, I suggest that the three of you duck. Go-go Gadget laser!"

As the three MAD agents dropped to the floor a beam of energy emerged from Gadget's index finger and burnt a smoking line into the wall behind them. The three hired guns staggered to their feet and studied the wall behind them.

"Uh-oh," Hunk groaned.

"Now who's got the drop on _who_, gentlemen?" Gadget sneered. "Okay, you mugs. Drop your pistols on the floor or the three of you will find out what burnt flesh smells like."

"Do as he says," Stiletto stammered. Simultaneously the three assassins threw their guns at their feet, and simultaneously three gunshots went off…

"Wowsers!" Gadget had instinctively put his arm before his face to protect himself but now he opened his eyes and lowered his arm to keep track of the killers. "You've got to be careful! If you don't keep the safety on you might…"

The three killers were lying on the floor on top of each other.

"You… idiot!" Stiletto growled. "You… got… _me_!"

"_I_ didn't get _you_," Hunk corrected as his strength drained out of him. "It was Rocky's gun! You got _me_! _I _got Rocky!"

"No," Rocky gasped in pain. "It was _Stiletto's_ gun that got me, Hunk. _My_ gun shot you and you shot Stiletto!"

"I saw everything," Gadget smiled. "Stiletto's pistol shot Hunk, and Hunk's gun got Rocky, and Rocky's gun hit…"

"I don't think they can hear you, Uncle Gadget," Penny said grimly. The three assassins were quite still. "Oh Uncle Gadget, how horrible!" the little girl hugged her uncle. "When they dropped their guns they accidently shot each other!"

"Yes Penny," her uncle nodded sagely. "How ironic that hired gunmen should know so little about guns! Let this be a lesson to you…"

At that moment the door burst open and Chief Quimby entered, followed by a pair of state troopers. "Gadget!" gasped the relieved police chief. "You're safe! We heard shots!" He stared at the three dead MAD agents. "What happened? Did _you_ do this?"

"Actually Chief they did it to each other," Gadget shrugged. "If you collect their guns, forensics will prove that my gun is the only one that wasn't fired. When I ordered them to throw down their guns they went off."

"That's terrible luck," Quimby sighed. "Stiletto knew all about Doctor Claw's operation here in Metro City. That means that Claw has slipped through our once fingers again. Oh well, the important thing is that you and your niece are safe, Gadget!"

"Looks like it," Gadget nodded. "Now that Louis Stiletto is out of the way I guess there's no reason for MAD to go after Penny anymore. She's no threat to them."

"I wouldn't say that," a determined Penny crossed her arms. "As soon as I grow up, I'm enrolling in the police academy!"

Quimby expected the child to be horrified after seeing three deaths right before her eyes, but Penny was made of sterner stuff. Maybe it was the fact that it was her parent's killers that died, or maybe she was just tough. Before he knew it, he was laughing in relief that everything was okay. Gadget, Penny and Brain started laughing too.

* * *

In his hidden headquarters, Doctor Claw was gloating. "So… Gadget, you made it this time but only at the cost of silencing the one man who could identify me. The joke's on you. While you were away, my agents installed hidden cameras and listening devices all over your niece's house! You won't be able to make a move without me knowing about it in advance. No need to eliminate you _this_ time, Gadget. I can take my time. I'll get you _next time_, Gadget… _Next time_…"

His overweight cat laughed along with him.

* * *

The next day, Inspector Gadget was unloading more of his belongings out of the Gadgetvan.

"That was sure something!" Penny declared as she walked up behind him. "I can't believe I saw three men gunned down by their own pistols!"

"It's their own fault," Gadget declared as he set down his suitcases and gave his niece his full attention. "If they would have had the safeties on they would have survived. Let this be a lesson to you Penny! A gun is not a toy!"

"You should never point a gun at someone, even if it's unloaded!" Penny nodded.

"You got that right," Gadget agreed. "Actors have been killed on the set by guns loaded with blanks! If you ever decide to own a gun someday, keep it hidden where children can't find them!"

"Don't shoot a gun into the sky just to make some noise," Penny instructed. "A bullet can travel almost two miles before it comes back down and hits someone!"

"If you want to play with a toy gun, I suggest you use one of the new ones with the orange barrels," Gadget told her. "The toys guns they sold when I was a kid looked real, too real! Some police officer or gangmember might get the wrong idea and shoot first and ask questions later!"

"Maybe it would be safer if we just stayed away from guns," Penny decided. "Unless you're trained for it, owning a gun could be more dangerous for you than to a burglar!"

"Good idea, Penny," Gadget nodded as he pulled his .38 police special out of his trenchcoat. "Now that I've got all these gadgets I don't really need this anymore. I'll put it away so it won't cause any trouble." He walked forward and tripped over the suitcases he had set down earlier. "Whoops!"

"Uncle!" Penny cried as his pistol hit the pavement and went off. "Are you all right?" She asked as Brain ran out to the front yard to see what had happened.

"Yes, but I think that our neighbor's birdbath has seen better days," Gadget said as he looked into the neighbor's yard. He picked up the gun and made sure the safety was _on_. "Tell you what, I'll turn it in at headquarters the first thing tomorrow; what do you say?"

"I'd say you that when it comes to safety you really stick to your guns," Penny smiled smugly.

"Penny you should be ashamed telling a joke of that caliber!" Gadget laughed as his niece and her dog joined in.

END


End file.
